Siblings

I've been thinking a lot about siblings lately. I've been thinking how I don't have any except for my adopted sibs that in actuality belong to Mike but whom I claim as my own. I've been thinking about how glad I am that my girls have each other. They are inseparable and literally can't stand for the other person to be deprived of something they get. Like they will refuse a treat if you aren't giving one to the other. And if you give them a treat, they automatically either ask for one for their sister or break it in half to share. And they snuggle in the morning. They say it's because they want to come snuggle with me and watch cartoons. But I know it's not. I know it's really that they love to snuggle down in my bed together and hold hands or touch feet while they watch cartoons and laugh. My mom and dad had them for 4 days at the beach and my mom said they did not say an unkind word to each other the entire time. I know that part is weird and won't always be so. But for now, it's all I know.

My Aunt Lori and Aunt Jayni are like this. They are totally best friends still to this day and they have a blast together. It gives me hope that my girls will not outgrow this stage and that they will still want matching pajamas at age 35 for Christmas.

But then I think about colleges and where they'll live/work. It's probably not realistic to think they'll go to the same college or live in the same town forever. I can't imagine them not living in the same town and in the same room. And lately they've been pushing for us to buy a bigger bed for them so they can sleep together.

I always swore to myself that if I had a sibling that they would be my best friend and we would pitch a tent in the backyard and sleep out there together.

I was talking to my mother in law about siblings. Her sister Annette died back in the early eighties. And her baby sister is courageously fighting a serious illness. And I saw how much pain she was in and for a nano second, I was glad I wouldn't ever have to feel that pain. Then, I thought of the famous "tis better to love and lost than never to have loved at all" and I realized how 100% I agree with that.

Mike always quotes the Garth Brooks song "standing outside the fire" cuz Mike is deep like that. But it's true, would you rather live your life safely never getting close to anyone, keeping things light and funny, having lots of surface friends and seeing your family a couple of times a year? Or would you rather roll up your sleeves, get in there and and get messy? I think intimacy in relationships is what life is about. Obviously I'm not talking about physical intimacy but really knowing someone at their core...good bad and ugly and them knowing you is really I think one of the main points of life. Doing that will bring pain, headaches, annoyances but will bring unparallelled joy as well. A lot of people spend a lot of time complaining about their family, how they annoy them and how they do this or do that. People fight over dumb stuff. Siblings especially.

If you are lucky enough to have a sibling, I hope you treasure them. I pray and hope that Katie and Jessica will always know how lucky they are and will never forget the feeling of what it's like to miss each other in the night.