Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Olympic Fan? Not an option...


So you know Mike. The guy who lives with me and my chicks? The one who we never see, who works many hours and has had for the past 8 years been either in med school, residency or in the first year as a FP Doc which is full of adjustments and figuring stuff out which amounts to lots of hours away? You know that guy that is leaving for the desert and war in just a few short precious days? Well, let me know if you see him, cuz I HAVEN'T.

Well, I'm only half joking. He's the lump on my couch. He has these 2 weeks off. But he hasn't come to bed (basically) in the past 3 days. Why? Is he busy unpacking the ginormous number of boxes in our garage left over from the move? Nope. Is he out visiting the sick and afflicted? Nuh-uh. Is he trying to get rid of the mole (who we have named Mark) in our backyard that he is spending all his time out there just trying to catch Mark? Not even close. He has been for 3 days, glued to the TV watching the Olympics.

For those of you that know us, you know Mike is an Olympic freak. It started in 1984 when McDonalds had their Go For The Gold game where you could get a free (insert McDonald item) whenever the US won a medal. When we won a Gold you got a free Big Mac, a silver got you a regular coke and a US Bronze netted you a small fry. If you remember, Russia was still an Olympic powerhouse in 84 and they boycotted the Olympics. Thus, providing the US with the most medals we have ever won in any Olympics. Now rewind to a summer in the life of a certain 14 year old boy, who lived just behind the neighborhood McDonalds. He and his brother could get a game ticket with "no purchase necessary" so they could get one everyday. In the morning AND in the afternoon. (different shift of workers = not remembering the brothers) You were only supposed to be able redeem one game ticket per visit but every McDonalds let you redeem whatever you wanted. Mike and his little brother Ron ate McDonalds all summer long. It was a 14 year old boys dream. Add Molly Ringwald or Brooke Shields and Mike would have been a 100% happy boy. As it was, he had to settle for all the Big Macs he could eat.

Thus, started the love affair with the Olympics. Ever since then, he's been psycho about it. We have had a tradition in our marriage. For opening ceremonies, we always have people over and we always cook food celebrating the host nation. (This year House of Cheang supplied the yummy menu of Asian delights) Mike always has an American flag draped from our entertainment center and he always makes everyone watching wave individual American flags when our athletes are competing. Usually we all have to stand when the National Anthem is being played and the freakshow that is my life goes on and on for two solid weeks. You guys think I'm joking. I'm DEAD SERIOUS. The dude is crazy.

Given that he is on his way to the desert and that he will miss the entire fall TV season, football season, BB season etc. And given that he had "use or lose" leave/vacation time to take. And given it was an Olympic year...you guessed it. Mike took these two weeks off so he could watch the Olympics. That's it. I figured he'd also put away boxes, also would get rid of Mark the mole, also spend time with his loving family but pretty much...he's been watching the Olympics 24 hours/day. I have come out each night to find him nodding off in front of his laptop with his spreadsheet open that gives our medal totals, upcoming events and all other Olympic data he needs to have at his finger tips. Homeboy is insane.

Just this morning, when the Olympic theme song blared from the TV at 8:30 in the a.m. I heard my girls squeal in delight "Olympic song daddy! Olympic song!!!" The girls' favorite events are gymnastics and the horsey games (equestrian) and they like the water polo matches because they think the kids are just swimming. Right now, (6:04 pm) we are watching the TiVo'd prelims of yet another swimming race and Mike is sleeping on the loveseat. But the remote is in his hand and he's sitting up in the chair so if you ask him what he's doing I'm 100% positive he'll reply "I'm watching THE OLYMPICS". Oh, and in case you are wondering... Cool Runnings is one of his favorite movies and he cries every time when they pick up their stupid bill-sled (yes I know it's called a bobsled). And he'll want me to erase that and not tell you about the crying, but tough, it's what he gets for putting us through this. Oh, and this year, the Chinese didn't even get their flag raised during opening ceremonies before he was crying because in his words "I can see the same pride in their eyes that I have in my eyes when I see OUR flag go up" yes. yes. It's cute until you live with it.

So my friends, I am watching A LOT of Olympics this week. I love the Olympics. I truly do. But the feather weight boxing match between Latvia and South Korea? I totally could live without watching that.

Help. Please send help.

P.S. Mike just read this post and asked me to correct one fact. He has averaged 3 hours of sleep per night in the past three nights not the zero hours I reported. This includes the nap I just caught him take while I was typing this. Freakin psycho.

PPS. He rewinded the TiVO 18 minutes just now...back to the point before he fell asleep. ugh.

3 comments:

Kori said...

HAH! That is awesome. I only say that because 'IT' is not living at my house!

At 4th of July if David's bro Don is around we have to stand up during the final firework...the big $50.00ish/4 and a half minute long one...and sing the National Anthem! I love it!

sacramentostakeclerk said...

That's funny!

Jody Carson said...

Oh Amy, I had completely forgotten that Mike is that passionate about the Olympics! I don't know how I could of......I'm -sorry?? Wow.....so your mole's name is Mark. Is that because he "marks" up your yard?? :) I wish I could wisk you away from your pain and suffering....... MIKE! ;)