Jingle Bells Santa Smells I scratched myself inappropriately during the song...

Today was the Christmas party at preschool. Oh 4 year old preschool. As Mike was engaged in mandatory training at Travis AFB, my Dad went with me and served as official photographer. Thanks Dad! Having you there was very handy for the gingerbread house building and for an extra set of eyes and hands to keep Katie and Jessica contained once the buffet was set out.

I blame their bad behavior on the penguin cupcakes. Those little plastic penguins on top were actual plastic rings you can wear on your fingers. It was too much for them to stand.
The kids had practiced a poem and two songs to perform for their adult guests. Jessica the German Nazi pointed out to the teacher as soon as they all lined up that "we will be doing the poem first, then jingle bells, THEN Rudolph right?" The teacher kindly said "yes Jessica you are right. That is the correct order." Jessica then turned to the little boy next to her and said "See??? I told you we weren't doing Rudolph first!" This all went down while all the other kids were silent, waiting for the signal from the teacher to begin. Yep, that's my kid. In kindergarten I ran around during the Thanksgiving play saying every kid's lines because I was positive they would forget and I had memorized the whole play. Mike did stuff like that too. We were both obnoxious know-it-alls. Thank goodness that has changed. Whew.

Then, during Rudolph, Katie had a little mis-step. First, you must realize that Katie marches to a totally different tune than anyone else in the room - any room. As they were performing, she was looking out the window watching cars go by, twirling her hair, dancing the little dance they made up to the wrong song. I wanted to yell "Katie! Look Alive! Jingle Bells has a dance...Rudolph has hand motions! Get your head in the game!" But I didn't. So she had her hands on top of her head as "antlers" while she danced the dance that went to Jingle Bells. She never took her hands off her head as she looked up at the ceiling and made some face that I couldn't figure out. All of a sudden around "won't you guide my sleigh tonight" she remembered she was in the middle of performing so she lifted her skirt, scratched her twinkle and picked up the hand motions with all the other kids. She managed to make it in time to "you'll go down in history" (it's the big finish don't you know?) and then curtsied to the crowd. At first, I wanted to die. Then, I started to laugh because it's just so Katie. Had she kept time and didn't spaz out I would have actually died of shock.

It was a fun party and the food was great. Most of all, I am so thankful to our teachers who devote countless hours beyond what they get paid to do, in order to make preschool a magical, fun learning environment for my girls. Seriously, just the time it takes to clean up all the glitter makes me want to get down and kiss their feet. Thank you to teachers everywhere! Notice all of the kids at attention and notice mine in the back of the group? Merry Hyper Christmas!

Dinner My Way...

I feel really pressed for time this past week. In looking at what is ahead of me in the upcoming week, I feel overwhelmed. So Mike suggested, rather than trying to cook or ordering take out, that I go to "Dinner My Way" or "Dream Dinners" and pick up some ready made meals. WE don't have a Dream Dinners in our town but we do have a Dinner My Way. So I picked up 5 meals for $50. They each serve 3 people. Given that we have two adults and two tiny people, they are the perfect size for our family. This had made life so much easier the past three days. We have dined on Shepherd's Pie, Greek Chicken with Orzo Pasta and Tortilla Soup with all the fixings. I have added bags of salad being sure to do dark leafy greens to keep things healthy. I've been surprised at how healthy the meals are in regards to fat/calories/sodium etc. Also, they have been delicious and easy. All I have to do is take the container out of my fridge, pop it in the oven and toss some dressing on the salad along with a diced tomato. We all feel like we've eaten a home made meal and it was easier AND cheaper AND healthier AND tasted better than fast food or take out.

If you are short on time, I recommend getting some ready made meals from one of these companies. You can also get frozen meals from Costco or the grocery store, but those are less healthy and you don't control the ingredients. These are all freshly prepared and I didn't have to do the work, but I was able to ask them to make them with less oil/salt than the recipe calls for.

I have so much cooking to do over the next week that any night I can do something else instead of cook like shop, wrap, clean, BATHE etc. is a good use of time and resources. Happy dinner time!

Thinking About It Tomorrow...

I am just that big of a geek with massive insecurities that I thought I would be the only person alive that waited for the past month for the airing of Gone With The Wind on TCM yesterday. You see, it was 70 years ago yesterday in which Gone With The Wind premiered in Atlanta, Georgia. And I guess I just really think I am all alone in my obsessions that I assumed nobody would even notice that it was on. Then, PDub went on and on about it on her website and I realized how silly of me that I thought I would be the only one to look forward to the anniversary of the biggest movie of all time.

I read Margaret Mitchell's massive book in 1988. I was 16. I carried it around with me at school and people looked at me like I was an alien that I would ever read a book that big. I loved it. Loved loved loved LOVED IT.

Then I saw the movie. And here is a little bit about that...

I wanted to be Scarlett. I wanted her spunk and courage and 19 inch waist. I died my hair black and determined to stay out of the sun. I looked into getting green contacts. I knew someday I would have a daughter named Katie. See, I told you. This movie was life changing.

Rhett Butler is still the coolest, most dashing hero in any movie. (Except for MAYBE Carey Grant in An Affair To Remember) I love how he handles Scarlett and how he sees her faults but loves her anyway. I dreamed of a man who would know me like that, but love me despite my flaws. I didn't marry a Rhett. I most definitely didn't. Luckily, God knew I needed an Ashley. Oh, by the way, Ashley is Katie's middle name. Told you...LIFE CHANGING.

Melanie used to bug me. I used to think she was plain and weak. How wrong was I? She is so beautiful and strong and amazing. I love her so much. When Scarlett came to Ashley's birthday party after India spread the rumor that Scarlett and Ashley were caught fooling around and Rhett made Scarlett go inside by herself so Melanie can kick her out in front of everyone and Melanie goes up to her and kisses her on the cheek and welcomes her into the house I was in a puddle on the floor. Melanie Hamilton Wilkes. Man, that lady had class.

Watching this movie at 38 is so different than watching it at 16. Scarlett, although she IS strong is selfish and cruel and not nearly as fantastic as she appears. Seeing Rhett lose Bonnie through my 38 year old eyes is painful and hits too close to home. Watching how Rhett loves everyone, from Mammie, to Melanie to Belle Watley to Ashley (he saves his life) and of course, Scarlett. The fact that he walks out on her in the end into the fog in some ways makes me love him more. In my mind, he always came back eventually. But that was when I was 16. Now, I'm not sure even Rhett and Scarlett could survive the loss of a child. Especially with all the blame back and forth. It's just so wonderfully sad.

Anyway, hope you enjoyed the anniversary. I can't believe Wizard of Oz and Gone With the Wind came out the same year. What a great year. It's like 1994 when Shawshank Redemption and Forest Gump competed for Best Picture or the next year that Sense & Sensibility and Braveheart were nominated. How did they choose the Oscar?

I know this crazy time of year does not justify the time it takes to watch this movie. But it's worth it and will remind you of all of our humanity and how some things are just timeless.

Gift Guide - Amy Meeker Edition

I decided this past weekend that I hate the mall with a surprisingly large amount of hatred behind my statement of well...hatred. I went to the mall last holiday season. Then once this past year, then once again this past weekend. And each time I hate it even more. I love, love, love, however, online shopping. I love it so much that I even bothered to click up (that's tech for pick up don't you know?) some gifts for my very high maintenance Grandmother who is not Grammie Bea who is in her own way high maintenance but nothing compared to this other Grandmother. Lucky for me, neither Grandmother knows what the Internet is. They think it's magical every time I get an email and think I order the presents I get from a big chute attached to my house and that they just magically appear.

So I thought you might feel a little bit overwhelmed and need to blaze through a last minute shopping list. I know you can still get these things online but you might have to pay for shipping given it's the 15th.

For Him: Bosca Leather Wallet from Nordstrom.com
For Her: Anything from Tiffany. I know, you think, it's out of my budget. But you'll be surprised by some of the things you can get. And one gift in a little blue box is so much better than say when your husband gets you a Playstation and Guitar Hero just so he can play Call of Duty. (Merry Christmas to me 2008)
For Your Brother: Sweaters from the Gap on are on sale 50% off. And socks that normally go for $15 are marked down to $4. Please do NOT just buy him socks.
For Your Sister: If she's a homey type (that's homey not homely) get her either the hand soap/hand lotion in the holder set from William Sonoma. If she loves to cook: you can't go wrong with either cookbook Mastering The Art of French Cooking, by Julia Child or The Pioneer Woman Cooks, by Ree Drummond. Add a nice bottle of olive oil or some fleur de sel (French sea salt). You can get all of it at Amazon. If she's a fashionista: Get her some earrings at Anthropologie. Don't buy a fashionista clothes, purses or shoes. If she's granola and the etsy type: Get her something from etsy, I have no frame of reference for this type of girl.
For the newlyweds: A really nice ornament from swavorski or Nordstrom.
For the teenager: cash
For the tween: anything with New Moon on it. You can get it all at Nordstrom online. If it's a boy tween, I hear video games are popular. I have no idea where to get those.
For the little girl: A trunk of dress up clothes. You can either get a ready made trunk at Amazon or you can go to the thrift store and make your own. The thrift store version are always better but who has time. My girls are getting a trunk of sparkly gloves, skirts, crowns, hats etc. I also recommend the American Girl merchandise. My cousin Tara recommends starting out your little girl with the bitty baby then moving up around Age 7 to the actual dolls. But I am not doing either yet because my girls are not into dolls at all. So I bought all the Felicity and Molly books and we are going to start there. Amazon again.
For the kids who just won't leave you alone for some damn peace and quiet: The Safari Monkey with extra wand. It's a monkey that you hide. Then as the kids hunt for it with their safari wands in their hand, the wands start to light up as you get closer to the monkey. The closer you get the more lights that light up. It's a 2009 version of the hotter/colder game. I plan on making Katie hide it for Jessica and vice versa. Again, Amazon.
For Grandmothers: Estee Lauder White Linen perfume. This is the way all Grandmothers should smell. Digital picture frames with a bunch of family pictures loaded on them are a great idea too. My Dad is going to put in the hours of time it will take to load those on the frame bless him. DON'T get Grandmothers flowers. They will die by New Year and they'll forget what you got them. Grandma's also seem to like anything with a picture on it of you. At least, they act like they do. Estee Lauder is available at ulta.com or sephora.com. The picture frames are best at costco.com or officedepot.com. Chocolate at sees.com.
For Grandpas: This makes me sad because we haven't had a Grandpa for a few years now. But when we had one we found they liked treats to eat, warm socks, flannel shirts and being taken out to dinner. I really miss our Grandpas.
For your neighbor or coworker: I don't bake. I was going to but I just don't. Also, I don't drink. I get people a really nice bottle of French Lemonade or Olive Oil from our grocery store. The lemonade will run you $6-8 and the olive oil will cost around $13-$20. Sea salt is also nice.
For your boss: A nice picture frame for their office is nice. They'll put their family in it but they'll think of you. Thus, you = family = being harder to fire.
For your kids' teachers: This is where we might disagree. I go all out for the girls teachers. First, I have 2 kids in the same class so I feel like my gift should represent two kids. Secondly, they work harder than anyone I have ever known for very little pay. They love and protect my children day in and day out and I really want them to know how thankful I am for them. I do gift cards to Borders in the amount of $50. But, remember TWO kids. A lot of the kids in our class do really nice ornaments for their teachers. But that's still going to run you close to $20. So I think a gift card for Borders, a gift card for a pedicure/manicure, a gift card for a massage or something to make them feel relaxed and pampered is the best way to go.
For your hair stylist/nail technician/cleaning person/nanny: The standard is a tip for the amount of one of their services. If you pay $30 for your nails, you leave a tip for $30 when you get your nails done in December. I give my mother's helper Kayla, one week of pay as her gift.

And please, especially this year, don't forget to donate your used coats to coats for kids, your gently used toys and clothes to a charity, a new unwrapped toy for Toys for Tots and any non perishable foods to your local food drive. There are also giving trees all over every town with the name, age and wish of a needy child on a tag. Then, you go buy that gift, wrap it and tape the tag to the gift.

And most importantly, for yourself: get yourself something good this year. If your "to do" list looks anything like mine, you are going to need a gift card for a nice long massage. Schedule it now for Saturday, the 26th. You'll be so glad.

I feel so much better...

My Barack O'Boyfriend sat down with Oprah and Michelle for Christmas At The Whitehouse. My faith in human kind and Christmas and wonderfulness is restored! Take that hussey Jenny McCarthy!

Because I'm sure Santa wanted a Playboy Playmate of The Year for his DAUGHTER

I remember when getting ready for Christmas included things like trimming the tree, making fudge and watching ol'Bing belt out his velvety smooth rendition of White Christmas. After today, my faith in Christmas might be in danger of vanishing a little bit. After spending 45 minutes trying to get from the Arden way exit to the actual mall parking lot, I arrived home tired and ready to kick my feet up. Then I saw a preview for a new Christmas movie that the guy inside the TV told me would be sure to be "an instant Christmas classic!" The movie is called "Santa Baby" and apparently, Sunday night, they will be airing both "Santa Baby" and "Santa Baby 2 - Christmas Maybe". So this movie had enough of a following LAST year that they made a remake. Oh yes they did.

The movie stars a very blond and airbrushed Jenny McCarthy. Is it just me or didn't she become famous by taking her clothes off and posing for Playboy? Wasn't she the wild MTV girl that flashed us and talked dirty to our college age ears? And now, I'm supposed to buy that she is the daughter of Santa Claus, played by Norm from Cheers! Are you kidding me? I expected Santa to belly up the bar for a cold beer and his daughter to wiggle her way across the room wearing mistletoe and nothing else. Is this really what "Christmas Classics" are coming to? A nudey model and an alcoholic bringing us the joy and magic of Christmas? And now in the 2nd sequel version, Tori Spelling's husband Dean is going to play the love interest of Jenny McCarthy. There are so many thoughts buzzing in my head about Tori and Dean that I even wrote a letter to the girls one time about it on this blog. I'm sort of ashamed of us and the ABC family channel and television in general. I know Jenny McCarthy is an Autism crusader and all that Jim Carey nonsense now, but really that just means she wants me to not immunize my kids and dates Jim Carey. Gross. Sorry Jenny. You have a fantastic shape for a Mom but your sweater is too tight to belong in any Christmas classic movie of mine. I vote to stick with Bing Crosby and Jimmy Stewart and a clay model of Rudolph for my Christmas movie cheer.

On Dasher! On Dancer! On Prancer! On Trudy?

Many of you know who my Grammie Bea is. She is awesomeness in a Grandma. She lives at The Meadows. The Meadows is an assisted living facility for senior citizens. It's a pretty classy joint. It's just been remodeled and is designed in sort of a Tuscan style. I can't say enough about how happy Grammie is at The Meadows. This is shocking to all of us who are related to her. We thought when the time came that she could no longer live alone that she would have to be dragged from her house kicking and screaming. Surprisingly, she went chose to go to the Meadows and she loves the food, activities, friends she has made and mostly the staff who in my humble opinion, are some the kindest people on the planet. It takes very special people to work with senior citizens. Yes, they are wise and wonderful and have amazing things to teach us. But they are also grumpy and complain about anything ranging from noise to the size of piece of pie they get for dessert. But the staff is hip and cool and loves these old people . One of the activities people announced to us tonight that the residents weren't old, they were vintage. I thought that was cute.

So tonight was the Christmas dinner celebration at The Meadows. Family members were invited to purchase a ticket for dinner and join their senior citizen. My Mom bought tickets for all of us and at 5pm (because hello? can you say early bird special) we gathered at the Meadows for some Christmas cheer. Huge shrimp cocktail, asparagus, seafood newburg and awesome prime rib greeted us. Surprisingly, there wasn't a jello or mashed potato in sight. Tiny individual desserts, sherbet punch and very very warm temperatures inside were had by all. (They gotta keep it very warm for all the arthritus and weak lungs in the crowd) Finally, after much waiting, jumping up and down and waiting some more...Santa arrived. Instead of sitting in a chair, he walked around and greeted all the people. He would approach a table and shout out in his jolly voice "Hello Norman! It's wonderful to see you. Ho Ho Ho!" And then he would go around the table greeting each person by name. After a few tables, I started to get teary. He was greeting people named Stanley, Betty, Isabel, Lou and Trudy. There was a Vivian and a Helen, along with an Ester and a Joy. As he made his way to our table with "Katie" and "Jessica", the thought came to me that the room was filled with my four year olds and many people that were 75 and up. But the look on their faces was the same. As all of us who were visiting family members checked our watches and wiped the sweat from our brow, the young and old had pure undiluted joy on their faces. They were in the presence of Santa Claus and it was Christmas and the world is wonderful right in this moment. Katie and Trudy both giggled as Santa reached out his white gloved hand. Jessica and Norman grinned from ear to ear when Santa got closer to where they were sitting.

It was wonderful. And I promised myself that I would try very hard to take a moment and think of things like a very very young or very very old person this year. I will try and enjoy the simple magic of Christmas. And I would like to say that there needs to be more people named Betty. We can't let that name die out. Get on that will you?

Different Strokes For Different Folks...

Katie's preschool teacher pulled me aside today when I dropped off the girls. "Amy, I wanted to know if there was anything we can do to include your beliefs and family traditions this Christmas so the girls feel included." I looked at her like she was sprouting antlers from her head and said "say what?" She went on to explain that Katie has been announcing her distinct and varied religious beliefs to the class over the past few weeks. When I asked her teacher what exactly did she tell you? She told me that Katie told her she was "A Jewish Mormon Lover of Christ!" She wanted to celebrate Hanukkah and Christmas and said she was a Jew that loved Jesus. I explained to her teacher that we were just normal Christmas believers, Mary/Joseph/Baby Jesus in Bethlehem, Santa/Reindeer etc. at North Pole, egg nog, stockings hung by the fire, caroling, mistletoe and lots of ham, turkey and fudge. Based on what Katie has been telling her, she was getting ready to break out the feast for Kwanzaa, the dreidel and menorah and candy canes, presents and carols. I told her that I appreciate it, but just the Christmas stuff is needed.



Points to Katie for wanting to encompass and involve all people from all different religions. She's a unifier that one. A little Jewish Mormon Lover of Christ.

All I Want For Christmas Contains Your Two Front Teeth

So Katie said the following to me today:

K: Mom. Do you know what I want for Christmas the most of all?
M: What?
K: I'll give you a hint. It's not a toy or a game and it is on every one's self.
M: I don't know what?
K: Mom, I want your smile for Christmas. I want to get a big smile from my very best Mama on Christmas Day.
M: Ohhhhhh (seriously touched)...that is SO sweet Katie Kate! I love you!
K: Don't you think Santa will really like that I want that for Christmas Mama? I'm sure that will get me on his nice list, don't you think?
M: Mmmmmmm. I'm not sure Katie. I'm sure Santa will think it's very sweet. Now go play.

That kid can work it like nobody I know. She is always working some angle. Her favorite sentence is "Mama, I have a GREAT idea!" Followed by something that is most definitely NOT a great idea.

If it's like this at 4, I don't have a prayer of survival when she's 14.

It's Beginning To Look A Lot Like - Chaos

Why do I not prepare more for the holidays? I need to start earlier. Much much earlier, so that I don't have the feeling deep in my chest that I have right now. That feeling that says..."Amy you are smoking a very special kind of crack if you think you are going to get it all done." Here's what I have done. Lights up outside: check. Christmas Tree and all decorating supplies out and ready to go: check. Presents for 70% of people bought: check. So I only have to: buy the rest of presents, decorate the tree, wrap 1,347 presents, take girls to see Santa, buy stocking stuffers, bake cookies and bread, have dinner with Grandma Meeker, go to Christmas party at Grandma Bea's senior community, go to Mike's Christmas party, go to dinner at Grandma Houlie's, buy and cook dishes for dinner at Grandmas, Christmas Eve at home, Christmas Day at Mike's parents, finish shopping, pack for a family of 4 for Mexican cruise, gingerbread houses, nails done, get girls hair cut, watch Frosty, Charlie Brown and Polar Express and make sure everything is spit and polished come the 24th. Make sure we are ready to leave on the 26th. Seriously, I am so glad we are going on a cruise this year right after it's all over. It will force us to relax and recover from all the hustle and bustle.

I am concerned but not complaining. I am so lucky to have my family and all of these things to do. There are lots of people who dread this time of year not because of all the activities but because of the loneliness. That would be the worst. There have been moments in the past week that have been wonderful. The excitement on the girls eyes when they got their special snow globes on their beds that officially kick off Christmas at our house, hanging lights with them in Santa hats, having MIKE HOME this year (can I get an AMEN and a HALLELUJAH?). We have had our hot cocoa and looked at lights and have had Christmas music on in the car 100% of the time. We went over to Grandma Bea's apartment at The Meadows today and brought her a wreath for her door and a pink table top Christmas tree with pink lights and purple/hot pink/lime green/turquoise blue ornaments. (Guess who picked out the pink tree?) Even though she acted like it was no big deal, we could tell she was really excited that she had a little tree and a wreath for her door. She was excited for the girls to decorate it with her. And after they were done she moved all the little balls to just where she thought they should go. My mom brought over an extension cord so we could plug it in for her. It was really cute. My Auntie Lori got her this really classy and cool sign for her door that says Count Your Blessings which is awesome because she needs to remember all the ways she's blessed for as long as Alzheimer's will allow her to. So the little sign is below the wreath that I brought and both have gold running through them so they look good together. So all in all, there have been some great moments so far.

Right now, the girls are counting to 100 and then when they are done I will be going in their room to read the The Polar Express while we suck on candy canes. They have their candy nightgowns on and they are so excited to read the book together. This will be the first time we've read the book, I just bought it Friday. If I seem a little frazzled and sort of stressed out, their level of excitement and Christmas joy causes me to remember each day that I need to take a second and just enjoy the season. They'll never have a Christmas again when they will be four. And let me tell you, four year olds are the BEST if you are looking for innocent joy and excitement and loudness. Ear splitting loudness. It's awesome.

Pictures of all of it to follow...

Thanks In The Giving - My Awesome Aunt & Uncle - Christmas Kickoff

Turkey Day came and went. The girls made dream catchers for all the guests out of paper plates, leather cord, beads and feathers. We cooked and seasoned, then went over to my parents for the feast. Auntie Lori and Uncle Terry were visiting from Oregon. Have I not introduced you to them before? Oh my. I must correct that immediately. Auntie Lori is my Mom's younger sister. Number 3 out of 4 girls. She is the awesomest! She was a school teacher and is the best "with kids" person I have ever known. When I was a kid she would direct our cousin Christmas Pageant on Christmas Eve. She would play the part of the angel and she would read the Christmas story while we played our parts dressed in bathrobes and towels. As the only girl cousin in the appropriate age group, I had to play Mary forever. Susan played the baby Jesus until she was like 5 or 6. We all acted like we hated it but secretly we loved it. Auntie Lori was the person that would flop on my bed when I was a teenager and ask me all about my friends and boys and get excited at all the stuff in my life that my Mom thought was dumb. She loved to talk, shop, read and would hide with me when it was time to do the dishes. She gave me my copy of Charlotte's Web, the first book I ever read AND the first book that made me cry. It's the book that made me realize that literature has amazing power. She always made me feel super important and smart, even when I made dumb mistakes. And Uncle Terry, well I can't say enough about Uncle T. Except for my Dad, he was the single biggest influence on me as a kid (as far as a guy goes). When I flew for the first time by myself, it was to Oregon to visit them. He was so different than my Dad. My Dad is mellow and chilled out. Uncle Terry was animated and emotional. My Dad did stuff to let me know he loved me. Uncle Terry would tell Jeff and I every night how much he loved us and how we were his buddies and he'd tell Shmedley stories about his pet raccoon. He was all about "awesome", "neat!", "wow" and animated stories about anything and everything that included sound effects and hand and body motions. When everyone in my family told me that Mike reminded them of Uncle Terry when he was younger, I knew I had a good guy and not to let him go. Both my Dad and Uncle Terry are "those" Dads. The ones that will do anything for you, will make signs to get you elected to Student Body President (my senior year) and pick up Thai food on the other side of town because you are sick and feel like chicken with yellow curry. (last night) They are the move you in and put up shelves and paint and fix stuff for you Dads. And they are the never let you down Dads. Ever Ever. Mike is on the right track on being that sort of Dad. It was important to me even at a young age that I picked somebody like that. And I totally totally totally did. (Except for the handyman part. Mike is all about hiring a handyman if it will save him having to do a huge job. Or calling my Dad if it is something little. But if you need your computer fixed or a vasectomy, Mike is your guy) Anyway, is there anything better than a good guy who loves being a husband and plays dress up with his daughters including a hot pink boa while watching Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer? I dare say there is not. (That is what is going on at my house right now)

So Thanksgiving was fine. I ate the wrong things and my Dad pitched a gravy hissy fit but we learned what Wondra was. (A separate post in necessary about Wondra alone) I made leftover turkey pot pie Sunday night. Yum. That recipe will go up on my recipe blog ASAP. Now, we are online shopping for gifts and looking forward to beginning Christmas traditions this week. We have already looked at lights. Tree and our own lights will go up this weekend.

It's sure different this year having Mike home. My heart goes out to anyone (Amelia) who's husband is deployed right now. It just sucks. I will be there again next year. I am not looking forward to it. For now, I am going to soak up all the family Christmas spirit and fun we can have. Rudolph and Yukon Cornelius just landed on the island of misfit toys so obviously...I gotta go.

Merci'

My favorite holiday of the year is Easter. I love the whole idea of resurrection coinciding with Spring and renewal and things blooming. I love all the colors of Easter, pastels all mixed together. I love Easter dresses and hats and the idea of Spring cleaning, although I never do it the way I would like. I love Easter dinner, hosting it, serving coconut cake for dessert and everything being white and pink and apple blossom green and lavender. Easter is the best. Tomorrow is Thanksgiving. My Mom always would say "thanksgiving is just a meal". When Mike and I moved away, Thanksgiving was always the holiday we didn't come home for. We wanted to save our vacation time for Christmas and all of us, Mike, my parents and I, were working full time so nobody got enough vacation time at Thanksgiving to travel all the way across the country. I was always grateful to my Mom for telling me not to worry and that "Thanksgiving is just a meal". It made me feel better about not being home. So the first year we had the girls, we were in Nebraska, it was snowing and we weren't going home. I told Mike, "Thanksgiving is no big deal. It's just a meal. So this year, I'm going to make fajitas instead of going through all the trouble." Mike, ever happy to just have food prepared for him, thought it was great. The girls were seven months old so they were not aware of the lack of turkey. I made awesome fajitas. And I couldn't eat them because I was crying so hard. We were all alone, it was Thanksgiving and instead of smelling celery, onion and bay leaf, my kitchen was filled with the smell of sauteed peppers and marinated beef. It was so depressing.

It was that year, as I put all of the salsa and guacamole in tupperware and went to bed with a crying headache that I realized that I really really really LOVE Thanksgiving. I love the food, the colors, the idea of friends and family gathering around a big table, the smell of pumpkin and spices and even the football. But what I realized that I love the most is that even though I tell myself every year that it is dumb and I am absolutely NOT going to do it this year, at some point I find myself pausing and taking a moment to think about what I am thankful for. I can't help it. It just hits me. It might be while I am peeling potatoes or setting out my clothes or going to bed that night. But inevitably, the nagging thought will come into my head and I will force myself to think of all the way I'm blessed. And dang it, wouldn't you know that doing it makes me feel great inside every single time.

So I decided I'm not going to even try to fight it this year. Instead, I've just gone over to the dark place and embraced all the gratefulness that surrounds me. Everyday, Katie and Jessica ask how many days until Thanksgiving and then they list all the things they are thankful for and I do the same. We've been doing it all month long. This year, Thanksgiving is on steroids. And my heart is just gross with all the mush and gush. It would be so lame not to write down what I am thankful for given that I've been thinking about it all the time. I hate when other mommy bloggers do this, I really do. So in an effort to not gross you out too much and give you a cavity from all the sugar shock, I am going to try and write down what I am ACTUALLY thankful for rather than what I am supposed to be thankful for. Feel free to stop reading at any time. I'm sorry for all the narcissism. Please forgive me.

Amy's Thankful List 2009

• That new show Modern Family. It is so funny and I really love looking forward to laughing that hard every week.
• Diet Coke (I don't think I need to elaborate at this point)
• New Moon and werewolves
• The fact that the girls don't fall asleep at night but instead giggle, talk loudly, make forts, tickle each other, come out to tell us they need water, bring the mobile into bed with them so they can play it over and over and get into all sorts of mischief. It is a nuisance and I hate it on a daily basis but at my core I am thankful for the memories they are making both for themselves and for Mike and I. It is a magical time in our lives.
• That we live so close to family.
• Rubios Gourmet Shrimp Tacos with no habanero citrus salsa on flour tortillas.
• Jeans
• Bangs
• Mike living in our house instead of a B-hut in Afghanistan
• Sleeping in on Saturdays
• Target
• Julia Child's cookbook and Pioneer Woman's cookbook
• Hearts cut out of paper by little hands that say "I Love Mama" in crayon.
• Katie and Jessica's teachers
• Mike's patients that bring us lumpia and stuffed animals for the girls and kind notes and cards.
• Kozy Shack chocolate pudding. Seriously, have you tasted that stuff?

That's all I can come up with for now. It's all really true. As Jessica would say, it's not a tease, a joke or a lie.

A Love Story - That Takes A Long Time To Tell

What's with me and all the movie related posts lately? Whatever. Anyway, Internet, allow me to introduce you to a little fellow called Lancelot. You might think you know this love story, but I assure you, you do not. Permit me to elaborate and take a moment of your time. You won't be sorry.

So, in 1968 the film version of the Broadway play Camelot came out. It won the Oscar for Best Film. It is my number 2 favorite movie of all time, right behind The Wizard of Oz. My parents took me to see Richard Burton play the role of King Arthur in San Francisco in 1983. It was my first live performance I'd ever seen. Think Pretty Woman at the opera and you will get my 11 year old self sitting there overcome with rapture and joy as I watched the story of Arthur, Guinevere and Lancelot unfold. And again, you might think that this is the story on which this post is going to focus. You would be so wrong. Please, for the sake of all that is good and holy, continue.

Vanessa Redgrave played the role of Guinevere in the film opposite Richard Harris as Arthur. A relative unknown Italian actor, Franco Nero, played the role of Lancelot. And let me tell you, he played that role better than maybe anyone has played any role ever in any movie. First of all, he was the most handsome man in the universe. In the opening scene the camera pans up from the ground to the wall of a castle in far off France and he is standing atop the castle as he answers the call of Arthur of England and the idea of the Knights of the Round Table. Might for Right and all that. Lancelot is the ultimate of all leading men of all time. He is noble, committed to a cause, religious and undefeated in any battle. Stud. Muffin. Then, he chucks all of it because he falls in love with the Queen of England and the wife of his best friend, King Arthur. Guinevere. They try to deny their passion but ultimately they admit their love for each other and have a torrid affair. But the affair destroys them. Not only do they hate themselves for betraying Arthur, but they have betrayed the cause of Camelot, which they both believe in with all of their hearts. They get caught. Guinevere is sentenced to burn at the stake. Lancelot is banished. All the knights are taking sides. War breaks out. Arthur loves Lance like a brother and Ginny as his wife and he must carry out her sentence of death. But secretly he prays that Lance will ride in and save her even though he knows it will result in war and the final destruction of Camelot. He loves them more than anything even though they have betrayed and hurt him. Sure enough, Lancelot charges in on his white steed just in time to cut Guinevere down from the stake (they had already lit the fire) and he charges out of Camelot with her on his horse. You might think they would run off to France or Egypt. Anywhere they could be together. But alas, they do not. Their guilt and shame for betraying God, Arthur and Camelot destroy their future. Ginny spends the rest of her days in a convent as a nun. Lancelot goes into battle and will end up dying by the sword years later. It's a sad story, but like Romeo & Juliet or Braveheart, it is wonderfully tragic. The chemistry between Vanessa Redgrave and Franco Nero is electric. They sizzle up the screen unlike any two actors EVER. And up until last year, I thought that was the end of our story. Not even close.

No one heard from Franco Nero ever again. He never did another film and I assumed he faded into Italian television like Lorenzo Lamas or Rick Springfield or that dude from the Dukes of Hazard. Dreamy one day, forgotten the next. Vanessa Redgrave went on to have a great career, appearing in film and television. I have always enjoyed her work, but never as much as her role as Guinevere. Vanessa Redgrave is the mother of Natasha Richardson, the wife of Liam Niesen. You'll remember last year, Natasha Richardson lost her life in a skiing accident. People magazine did a big article on Natasha Richardson's life. There was a picture of the family gathered at the funeral. There in the picture was her mother, Vanessa Redgrave and standing by her side was her husband of forty years. You guessed it. It was Franco Nero. Lancelot. I cried my eyes out. I showed Mike and I couldn't even get out why I was crying so hard. I told him "they ended up together...hiccup...in real life. waaaaaa". I felt strangely like something unsettled in my past got put in exactly the right place. It turns out they fell in love while filming Camelot and the rest as they say...is happily ever after history. And you may be thinking, that is the end of our story. Nope. But we are getting there.

Fast forward to last Friday night. We are waiting for New Moon to start. A preview of a movie called Letters to Juliet came on. Amanda Seyfried, the daughter from Mama Mia is staring in it (I love her) opposite Vanessa Redgrave. It's about a place in Verona, Italy (the town where Romeo and Juliet is set) where people go to this wall and they leave letters to Juliet about love, loss and heartbreak. Amanda Seyfried finds a letter behind a stone in the wall written in 1957 by a woman named Claire all about how she was set to run away with this guy named Lorenzo but she didn't show up and she left him there wondering and how she tried to find him later on but couldn't. Amanda's character sets out to find Claire. She finds her in England where she is a widow but has loved Lorenzo her whole life. She (Amanda Seyfried), Claire (Vanessa Redgrave) and Claire's grandson set out for a small town in Italy to find Lorenzo. As I watched the preview I sort of found myself unable to breathe. My heart kept speeding up and I was gripping my seat. Finally, they find Lorenzo. He comes around the bend in the Italian countryside, in a vineyard, riding a white horse. He is an old man and is weathered and wrinkled. It is Franco Nero. And he is riding toward Vanessa Redgrave. Mike said he turned his head to sip his coke at the exact moment that I put all of it together and he said I gasped super loudly and just burst into tears. You guys I was like hysterically crying. Mike squeezed my hand and all I could say is "it's him!!!" And I couldn't stop crying until five minutes into New Moon. And I've been crying every time I've thought about it since. And that my friends, is the point of this post.

I know it makes no sense. But my entire childhood and adult life I have wished that Camelot could have ended differently and that Guinevere and Lancelot could have ridden off into the sunset together. I've watched it like over 50 times and each time I hope that maybe it'll end differently. And then I found out that in a very real way, it DID end differently because the two actors that set the screen on fire with their passion were really and truly in love and ended up together and have been together for 40 years. And now to get the gift of getting to see them reunite on-screen, knowing he hasn't made a film since he made one with her and that the chance to work with her again has brought him out of retirement and that they are all old and wrinkled but still so in love...it's just too much happiness for my heart to hold. I think it's the very best kind of love story.

I know it's dumb. But if you go out and rent Camelot, you will TOTALLY get it.

New Swoon...

I am, or most definitely should be, arrested. I should be locked up. I should register on the sex offender list in all 50 states. I lusted after a child. A child. I got giggly. I even let out a very loud woop woop and pumped my arm in excitement in the middle of a darkened theater. Did you hear me? I PUMPED my arm. I YELLED woop. Then another woop. I giggled (cackled more like) every time Jacob came on the screen. And given he had no shirt on for the entire movie, I found myself sad during the one scene in which he wore clothes. He is 17. That means, had Mike Meeker and I procreated on our honeymoon I could be.... Oh I can't even say it. His. Mother. He could walk into my house and say "hey there. MOM." And I'm quite positive I would not be allowed to want to run full speed into him, jump onto him and make out with him for like five hours. I am going to hell. And jail. And all the bad places people like me should go. It was so good. So. So. Good.

So me and Mike Meeker went on Friday night while the girls had a sleep over at Grandma and Grandpa's. We stood on line for two hours with this lady that would not shut up about this girl in her Bible study and how she was such a bleepity bleep bleep bleep. And how at church she totally bleeping bleep bleeped. And I kept thinking, DANG LADY. Is there anything about Bible study and church and all the cussing around all the twi-tweens that doesn't go together? Shut the bleep up and Jesus loves you, is basically what I wanted to say. We purposely sat in front of a row of ten year old girls, all clad in New Moon tshirts and necklaces and they took pictures every five seconds. We giggled and jumped up and down in our seats waiting for it to start. Now, you might think I was the only one in our party of two that was giggling and jumping up and down. Not so. Mike Meeker is just as big of a twilight fan as his wife. He has read all the books. More than once. He loves Edward. As in LURVES HIM. As in, he secretly thinks he is Edward but is willing to admit he might be a cross between Edward and Jasper and he was so excited for the Volturi scene and to see how they did the wolves he couldn't form coherent sentences on the way to the theater. He saw a bumper sticker that says "I drive like a Cullen" and he really really wants to get it. He is firmly encamped in Team Edward. I however, have always been in Team Jacob and now that I saw this movie, I will be a supporter of Team Jacob FOREVER. I would so pick Jacob. The ONLY advantage to Edward is his money.

We are adult enough to admit that the Twilight movie was very bad. But New Moon was awesome. We loved it. Okay so the part where Edward and Bella are running in slow motion through the forest as Vampires in clothing from 1918 was a little stupid. But everything else was so awesome. We cheered right along with the gaggle of girls behind us. (and the rest of the theater) We stayed up like two eighth graders until 2 am talking all about the movie and the books and all things Twilight. I told Mike we had to go to bed and that he was going to start his period ANY DAY. Seriously, if he doesn't stop he might have to get some tampax to keep in his car just in case.

And as for me. I'll just be in jail, sitting in my cell with a secret little smile on my face thinking all sorts of wicked thoughts about a 17 year old. But I hear he turns 18 in 82 days. And yes, I heard that because I went to a fan website. And yes. I am aware I am in a very scary place mentally and emotionally. Please tell my daughters I always loved them. I just loved the werewolf a little bit more.

Follow The Yellow Brick Road...

This might be the most important post I ever write. The girls and I watched The Wizard of Oz last night. Oh yes we did. For those of you that love me (Auntie Lori) you understand why I am tearing up as I even type the words. For those of you that don't, let me take a moment to explain.

The Wizard of Oz. Oh The wonderful Wizard of Oz. It has been my favorite movie since I was like a fetus. I would wait until April of every year for it to come on television. There was no pause button, no On Demand gizmo, no rewind if I missed something. There was no VCR/DVD/Blue Ray nonsense. You could not download it on your iphone. You waited. You checked the actual TV Guide. The one made of paper. You got your blanket ready. You got your popcorn popped. You got up and changed the channel. Manually. You waited. Then that MGM Lion would roar and the black and white credits would start rolling and you knew you were in the presence of magic. I swear fairies shot straight out of my television. My hands would pour sweat and I would watch and hang on every single solitary word. As I grew, the meaning of The Wizard of Oz grew as well. It was no longer a movie with a colorful cast of characters and the scariest movie villianess of all time. It was chock full of life lessons that I dreamed of teaching to my children someday.

So last night, the journey down my own personal yellow brick road reached another milestone along the way to wherever I am going. I sat on my couch with my two little girls. I sat in the middle so my arms would be able to hold each of them during the scary parts. Six hands ooozed so much sweat that we needed to get a dish towel. We had blankets. We had popcorn. We had a flat screen. We had high definition, pause, rewind, fast forward, slow motion and closed caption if we wanted it. And you know what? Magical fairies still flew out of the television. The same ones that flew out and visited me in 1976. How did they know how to find me?

Needless to say the girls loved it. Jessica cried so hard at the end when Dorothy had to say goodbye to her friends in Oz and refused to believe that the farmhands were her friends from Oz. She had me hold her forever and she just had to call her Daddy and Grammie to tell them she was so so so sad. I asked her if she wishes that she didn't watch it and she said "well mama, I will watch it again tomorrow and see if I wish I didn't watch it." Katie just plain loved it. She has been dancing around and singing "ding dong the witch is dead", or "because of the wonderful things he does". It was simply magical. Jessica's favorite person is the tin man, the sentimental, gentle soul. It's not surprising. Katie's favorite is the scarecrow. The class clown of the group. Again, not a big surprise. It's funny, as a little girl, all I ever wanted to be was Dorothy Gail from Kansas. I wanted those sparkly shoes and that little dog in the basket. I identified with her fear and her desire to explore the world. Later on, much later on, I also came to learn that you can only truly find your heart's desire within yourself, your home and your family. There's nothing out there in that great big world that answers some big mystery or provides some holy grail. It is as mythical as Oz itself. Home, God, family, love and self. It's what it is truly about. Finding happiness within. What a life lesson to learn. I think it's harder to learn for girls. We are bombarded with Victoria Secret Angels, and Angelina Joile's lips and perfection everywhere. To really understand that your worth comes from being a daughter of God, from having integrity, from being real was a tough one for me. I hope it isn't so for my little tin man and scarecrow. I hope I can help them know this earlier than I did.

So I guess that's all I have to say about it. I leave you with this quote from the Wizard. It was at this point in the movie that Jessica and Katie joined me in crying and we all sat there and sniffled as we realized Dorothy would have to say good-bye to her wonderful friends. As the Wizard gives the heart to the tin man he says..."and now remember this my sentimental friend. A heart is not judged by how much you love, but by how much you are loved by others." Today my heart is full and overflowing. Hope yours is too!

Do You Believe?

Over at my favorite blog Nat The Fat Rat, Natalie challenged all of her readers to examine what they believe. Please don't go read her blog though because it's so cute and witty you'll never come back here. Stop it. Don't you click that link. Whatever, you suck.

So I really dug down deep today to examine what I truly believe. Not as in what I am supposed to believe or what I should believe but what do I really, deep in my gut, down to my tippy toes, really, truly, madly believe in? The following is what I came up with. (Please keep in mind that my monthly visitor Veejay Singh will be making an appearance any day so this list was made while highly emotional. Yeah, so I call my period Veejay Singh, isn't that cute? I have my reasons that I will explain to you if you want to know, just email me. I can't post it.) Okay, here's what I truly deeply honestly most sincerely believe:

• I believe in parenthood. This may surprise you that this is first on my list. But the way I have changed inside since becoming a parent is so monumental that I can't even talk about it sometimes. And same with Mike. We were laying in bed on Saturday morning listening to the strains of Imagination Movers on Disney Channel and we agreed that it is so cool that we each feel exactly the same about our kids that we don't seem crazy obsessed to each other. Because let me tell you, if regular people knew how much me and Mike Meeker talk about our kids and spy on them and listen to them when they don't know and how many times we go in their room while they are sleeping and just sit on the floor and stare at their little sleeping forms by the light of the silvery moon, we would be locked in a padded room. FOR. SURE. We are stalkers. We stalk the lives of Katie and Jessica. And we love it.
• I believe in the healing power of Diet Coke. The other night, I was in my zone, cooking up a fabulous dinner for me, Mike Meeker, K, J and my parents. I got a little tired, a little winded and I chugged a Diet Coke straight out of the fridge. It was frosty. It was COLD. It was so good. And I instantly felt better. When I am on a road trip and I think, crap the desert will never end, or this road is so BORING, if I stop at a gas station and fill myself up with a 44 ouncer with extra extra crunchy type ice, I turn into a driving machine! I love Diet Coke. It has been there for me through many many many rough times. Whether it is over ice, straight out of the can, adorned with a cherry or lime or warm, flat and on my night stand, I just love it. I even love the can. Silver, black, red...obviously the three best colors ever. Look in my closet and you will understand.
• I believe in low maintenance friends. You know those friends that are all clingy and needy and are all "don't like that girl cuz she was so rude to me" or "why haven't you called me back?" or "do I look fat?" or "waaaa waaaa waaaa!"??? Those chicks don't really work for me. Look sister, if I wanted a girlfriend, I'd become a lesbian. I want a friend. Here's what they look like so you can snag some for yourself. They are in your life for good, no matter what. No matter if they haven't talked to you for six months or a year because you can't get your crap together. They know the real you, the quirks and the stuff you suck at and they love you anyway. They call you on your crap and when you hurt them they let you know. Then, after you say sorry, they forgive you. And they don't hold a grudge. They would get on a plane in the middle of the night if you needed them. And you would get on a plane in the middle of the night if they needed you. But you know that unless a child or husband dies, you won't have to pay that much for a plane ticket. They aren't superduper skinny. When you see them, no matter how long it's been, you are so happy and at some point in time during the visit at least once you will do the following: laugh so hard you can't speak and you clutch your stomach and you will cry your eyes out.
• I believe that Jesus is my Savior and is the Savior of the world. I really do you guys. I believe He truly lived. I believe He taught people to be kinder and more loving. I believe He taught us to fight our natural tendency to be jealous, petty, judgemental and intolerant. He spent most of His time with people that were cast out from normal society and were considered immoral and bad. He loved them and taught them His gospel of love, peace and hope. I believe that this stuff really truly happened. I don't believe it's a fairytale or some story that Christians made up. I believe He suffered and died for all of our sins and I believe He rose from the dead and came back to teach people more about what is truly important. I believe He did this willingly because He loves us. I believe that we can get through anything in life if we turn to Him and allow the miracle of His atonement to truly work in our lives. I believe this 100%. There's a poem that Carol Lerwill, the kindest of ladies, gave to me when I was 18 and I carry to this day inside my scriptures. When I feel overwhelmed and unsure I turn to it. It says, "I know only as much of the world and God, as a creature with two eyes must. What I understand I love and what I don't understand, I trust." I am far from a perfect Christian. I struggle daily make my life reflect what I believe. But it doesn't mean at the end of the day that I don't believe it. Know what I mean jelly bean?
• I believe in shopping online for children's clothes: I took K&J shopping for clothes on Saturday night. LUCKILY, my Mom came with us. She ended up pushing them in a cart to the toy aisle or around and around the store while I shopped for their clothes. I THOUGHT that they were getting older so maybe they could come in a dressing room and try some stuff on. I was buying clothes for fall/winter and didn't quite know what length they needed in pants, how much of a waist they might have and what size of shoes would be perfect for shoes to be worn with tights vs. shoes to be worn with socks. I envisioned a fun, multi-generational girls night of shopping. Giggling in the dressing room, oo's and ah's when something was just too too cute to pass up. It didn't happen. The girls hated it. I hated it. I still ended up coming home with clothes that don't fit them and they did not see the inside of a dressing room. It was horrible. I have so much more fun and I get way better deals when I just stick to shopping online after they go to bed.
• I believe in straight leg jeans. All this skinny leg, boot cut, flare crap is just too much. Straight leg jeans look good on everyone. You might think you look good in flare jeans but unless you are a size 2, you don't. Skinny leg jeans look good on a lot of people as long as for every 10 pounds you weigh over super model size you add one inch of shirt length and add one size to your jeans. Do not squeeze into skinny jeans if your size comes in more than one digit. And the chubbier you are the darker the denim you must wear in all cuts. But to be safe, everyone from size 0 (I know no one at this size) to size whatever (I know a lot of people at this size) just get dark denim, straight leg jeans. And unless you are positive that you have a fabulous butt, cover it a little. It can't hurt to be sure.
• I believe in eating quality food: This does not mean healthy food. It means quality. We only have so many meals to consume in life. Let's enjoy them. Let's eat artfully prepared, flavorful, creative, fun dishes. Let's experience cuisine from every corner of the globe. Let's linger over our meals with good conversation, sipping our Diet Cokes and laughing. Let's talk about our day, both the good parts and the bad over a great salad and fabulous plate of pasta. Let's put down the fast food cardboard that we eat in our cars while trying to get everything done. Let's slow down, dine on white plates, sample vegetables and fruit in every color of the rainbow, sink our teeth into something prepared with love whether it is curry beef from your favorite Thai place or your Mom's meatloaf. And if while we are enjoying our food if we could try and eat smaller portions and make it healthy...all the better. But that's not necessarily what I truly believe in. But I do truly, deep down in my heart believe that crappy food is such a waste. When I eat something in my car on the go and I don't taste it and am glad I didn't because it was in all honesty crap on a cracker, I am so sad because I should have stopped at the grocery store, bought a perfect piece of fruit and some fabulous cheese and I would have been so much happier.
• I believe football is a problem in my marriage. When I married Mike, he knew not of football. He was raised in a household where the Dad did not like football. The family did not watch television on Sundays. It was not allowed. When we got married, I was a football FAN. I loved the San Francisco 49ers and the Stanford Cardinals. They were my boys. I knew A LOT about football. I could name the players, the coaches, the mascots and I could tell you how everyone was doing most of the season. I thought this made me extra cute to boys. I was the cool football girl. I was giving off the signal that if you dated me you wouldn't have to worry about being dragged to some chick flick and having to examine our relationship all night long. We could catch a game, maybe even eat some nachos. But alas, my new husband Mike Meeker did not care. He was a baseball fan. "Come", I said to him, "give football a try." He began to watch. He watched some more. Mikey likey. Fast forward 17 years. Mike records HOURS of college ball on Saturday, NFL on Sunday, sports center, college game day final and all the other analyzing type Chris The Devil Berman shows and it has become the BANE OF MY EXISTENCE. I hate football now. I don't want to watch it or hear about it or know about it. I get itchy when football season approaches. (Except for Troy Polamalu because how can you not? The guy is an animal) And Mike reminds me every year that I can not say anything to him about his love of football because I made him watch it and it's all my fault that I created a monster. I gave unto my husband football and he did watch. I hate it when that happens.
• I believe in bed time. I used to be a night owl. I have been known in college to frequent the Denny's at three. In the morning. Oh yeah, I was a bad ass. Now, if it is past my kids' bedtime and they are not in bed I get this panic, heart palpation feeling inside. Bedtime must be observed. Because if their bedtime gets pushed back, guess what? That's right. My bed time gets pushed back and that is where the real sweaty armpits and panic attacks start happening. Because, and they don't tell you this before you have a kid, no matter what time you put the little suckers to bed, they will get up at exactly the same time in the morning. Yep. Just because you let them stay up, it does not translate into them sleeping in. Apparently, when you are 4 and you open your eyes in the morning you think the world is bright and full of fun and possibility so you just pop out of bed all happy and ready to take on the day. When do they get to the age where they wake up like a normal person and realize if I hit the snooze button and get an extra 20 minutes of sleep that it will probably be the best 20 minutes of my day?

I believe in a lot of other things too. I gotta go watch Dancing With The Stars in like two minutes because Derek Hough and Maxim Smirkovski are hawt.

Thank you and goodnight.

P to the S: Donny Osmond? Who knew?

Friday Friends and Family

Every Friday from now on, I am going to introduce you to some people we like. It might be friends, it might be family, it might even be you. It might even be someone we don't know but who we just really really like.

Today, I'd like to introduce Katie and Jessica's very own super hero, their cousin Cayden Meeker. Cayden is one year to the day older than the girls. When the girls were little, like babies, Cayden came to visit and entertained them for an hour by just jumping off of a stool in front of their high chairs. They would laugh hysterically and then he'd do it again. Lather, Rinse Repeat.

Whatever Cayden does, thinks, eats or drinks - you can bet my daughters will want to do, think, eat and drink it. We have had to have teriyaki chicken pineapple meatballs once/week since we visited Cayden in October because "Did you know Mama that this is CAYDEN'S favorite dinner?"

I love Cayden because he has this best heart. He is kind and loving and good. This past visit a few weeks ago found him surrounded by five girls (Jessica, Katie, Sariah, Chloe and his little sister Emma), three Moms (me, Amber and Faith), one Grandma (Marilyn) and a little baby girl (his sister Gracie). He was the lone male in a sea of females. He endured it with kindness and even managed to look like he enjoyed it. He was a good sport, agreeing to play the part of the prince to the girls' princesses or the monster to their squeals of delight. One morning it was just me and Cayden in the kitchen and he requested some toast. I made his my very best toast, slathered with butter, cinnamon and sugar. We chatted away about life and such. He told me that I made the best toast he'd ever had and could he please have another piece. We chatted some more and I was reminded of what I have known since he was a baby...this kid is pretty special and he's going to do amazing things in his life.

Amy's Parenting...Judge Away...Come On I Dare Ya

Let's describe this little ensemble shall we? Starting from the bottom, leopard print slippers on the wrong feet. A dead unicorn costume on the floor. Moving up we have last year's Christmas pajama nightgown that is a print of gigantic pieces of candy. A jaunty orange apron from Home Depot compliments the ratty nightgown. Atop the rats nest of hair is a straw cowboy hat and pink butterfly sunglasses with pink lenses.

Katie: "Mama, what do you think of my outfit?"
Me: "Ummmmmm..."
Katie: "Do you think I look like a beautiful princess?"
Me: "Sure?" (If you were from the land of carpenters and hobos)
Katie: "I think I should wear this to school so all the kids can see my interesting and beautiful outfit."
Me: "Ummmmm, maybe we could take a picture because it lasts way longer than just one day at school." (translation: there is no way in hell you are wearing that to school chica)
Katie: "Great idea Mom! A picture is super and I can give it to my friends and maybe they can find outfits like this one and we can get dressed up in them and have a TEA PARTY!!!"
Me: "Sure, super idea." (My kid is going to get the crap beat out of her on the playground. Maybe not today. Maybe not at 4. But the beating is coming people, the beating is coming.)

In summation, I wish this conversation and outfit was an odd occurrence at our house. But it's like this all day everyday. One day she came out with eleven different bows in her hair, high heels with knee high plaid socks. She is so weird.

Hermits

I am on day six of not leaving the house. Well that's a lie. I left the house on Saturday night for 20 minutes. Just enough time for my swine flu filled kids to throw on a french poodle and kitty costume and ring the doorbell of their Grammie and Papa, carefully receive two kinds of every candy in the bowl without transferring germies, swing my Grandma and Grandpa's but not get out of the car as to not transfer germies and head home. That has been my only outing in six days. I have been caring for the sick and afflicted which after all is what Jesus told us to do in the first place so I keep telling myself to cut myself a break but I can't help but feel like a total slacker/loser/anti-social/nerd/hermit. All I seem to get done is tickle backs, and legs and rub heads and get sippie cups of juice/water, watch every princess movie ever made, administer the ever controversial tamiflu (anti-viral medication to kill the swine) and stick the Braun Thermoscan into the ears of my housemates. I feel like I have two infants again because they are sleeping with me and making all sorts of noises in the night from cries to strange laughter and talking about unicorns. (I think this is from fever) I have discovered that this sort of vigil keeping, Florence Nightingale work exhausts my mind and body. You wouldn't think it would be that hard. Case in point, I didn't have to get dressed. I didn't brush my hair or put on makeup. So what's with all the tired? I think it's stress from wondering how the swine flu coming to my house might or might not change our lives forever. After all, that's what they are saying about this bug. You just never know how each person will respond to this flu. So I have been on high alert (aka super neurotic) looking for signs of breathing problems and monitoring the fevers degree by degree. Is that cough getting lower in her chest? Do I hear a rattle? Her fever is 104 for the love of all that is good and holy, call an ambulance! These are the things I have been randomly yelling to Mike from our master bedroom where he is sleeping on the couch trying to survive not the swine flu, but me. No, he says, the cough is in her throat and is just post nasal drip, no you don't hear a rattle and if anyone needs an ambulance around here it's going to be me because my ears are squirting blood because they just can't listen to you anymore. These are the things he says to me. I think he can take that Hippocratic oath and just throw it out the door right now because I am pretty sure part of it goes "and I swear to validate my wife when she is freaking out because our kids have the swine flu and she just won't shut up".

So here are the facts of the case and they are undisputed. (name that movie) Katie got the H1N1 and started to show symptoms Tuesday morning. I took her to the doctor, they tested her with a nasal swab and it came back positive for H1N1. We got her on the antiviral medication right away. She had no fever as of Friday morning and has been her spunky funny self since. Mike and I already had this virus this summer so we got sort of low grade fevers but never truly got super sick. It was more like when your body is trying to fight something off. Stinging/burning eyes, tired and minor aches and pains. Jessica spiked a fever on Thursday. She had a deeper cough than Katie had so I was more worried about her. But we got her on the antivirals right away and she hasn't had a fever since Saturday afternoon. But just to be safe, I decided to not let them go back to school until Wednesday of this week. I want the other Moms in our class to know I take the safety of their kids seriously and wanted to give us four days of no fevers before they head back to school. I would want the other moms to do the same thing, know what I mean?

Halloween was spent giving out candy with the girls helping by holding the bowl at the bottom but not touching the candy. They got to dress up and thought it was so cool that the other kids knew to come to our house. They loved every time the doorbell rang. I think they had more fun this Halloween than they did in years past where they went trickortreating to all the houses.

Final Score: Meekers 4.....Swine Flu 0

post-script: My niece Gracie who is three months old got the H1N1 and is now fine after over a week of being really sick. My sister in law Heather, nephew Devon and brother in law Rick all have H1N1. As of today, Heather is feeling better and Devon is starting to feel better. Lots more people we know have H1N1, it seems like it's everywhere already. I think this flu season is going to be very bad for some families. We are still all going to get vaccinated against H1N1, I'm just saying. Not to be all politically n stuff...

Positive- as in we are positive Katie has H1N1 because her swab test was positive. Ugh!

Had To Get Away (Vacation Part 2)

I love my cousins. When I was a kid and my cousins from the Pacific Northwest would come into town, my excitement would skyrocket to spaztic proportions. My kids are no different. As an only child, there are no first cousins on my side of the family for K & J. We have wonderful cousins on my side, but we don't see them often enough. Mike however, has five younger brothers. And because it took us three million years after we got married to get around to making actual babies, the girls have cousins that are older than them as well as a host of younger rug rats as well. And just like their mama AND daddy, they worship their cousins. Especially Cayden who is one year to the day older and a boy and knows how to climb up on stuff super high and jump and will happily always agree to be the "monster" and allow them to permanently play the role of princess/puppy/kitty/cheerleader/dancer etc. (I would like to point out that I encourage my daughters to also pretend playing CEO, star athlete, corporate tycoon etc. Katie told me when being CEO means she can wear glitter and sparkles and pink lip gloss she'll think about it. I told her that a CEO could wear glitter and sparkles just not during work hours. So far, it's not catching on and we remain a heavily populated princess household) ANYWAY, cousins are the coolioest. And so is elk hunting with brothers apparently blah blah blah. So our travel savvy foursome found ourselves driving East to the lovely (?) state of Utah where Mike's brother Chuck, my rad SIL Amber and the aforementioned Cayden (aka the super hero), his 3 year old sister Emma and my new little bitty beautiful niece Gracie lives.

Mike ditched us and went up the mountain to go elk hunting with his brothers and Dad. They watched conference, the Steelers game, blah, blah, cold, snow storm, blah, full moon, blah, too cold and bright to produce good hunting, blah and blah and then he came back to Chuck and Amber's. Meanwhile, Amber and the kids, my other SIL Faith (married to Ken living in North Carolina) and her daughters Sariah and Chloe, my MIL Marilyn and my entourage spent four happy days hanging out and doing things geared to the awesomeness that IS cousin time. Basically, they ran around Amber's house destroying it and screaming in delight. We attempted to tire them out at the bouncy place but their energy knew no bounds. We went to the Mayan and watched the cliff divers, the girls went to preschool and ballet class with Emma one day, we cooked and hung out and lunched at delicious Bajio and Blue Lemon. I cooked my Julia Child chicken. We laughed and went to Rodizio and got caramels from Trolley Square and just hung out. Amber let me drive the whole time because you know...my freakishness? I was thankful and relieved. Mike came back from hunting early because it was so cold so we got to spend time with the boys as well. Funtastically fun. We had the best road trip and we rocked out to my new stereo in which you can plug an IPOD. 2,000 + songs of rocking out and singing at the very toppest of our lungs.

Great times with my great little family. We have fun together for which I am the most thankful of all.

All I Ever Wanted...(Vacation Part 1)

Well ya'all, it's been a while since I posted. We have been a busy little foursome, coming and going to various parts of the country. South Carolina was first on our list in late September. We boarded a plane in San Francisco, a red eye all night flight if you were wondering, and jetted our way to the East Coast landing in Jacksonville. Our vacation was in Charleston, SC. Oh...Jacksonville isn't near there you say? Don't worry, we rented a van and drove and drove and drove after flying ALL NIGHT with two 4 year olds until at last we arrived at our beautiful vacation beach house on Isle of Palms in South Carolina. I did not make these crazy travel arrangements. My darling husband, El Cheapo, planned out our itinerary. Apparently he saved a lot of money by turning us into Zombies. I called our travel plans "The Meeker Family Vacation - Vampire Edition" because all of our travel was at night. I'm funny that way.



Anyhoo, we joined wonderful, amazing, kind, funny and generous friends from Mike's residency. There were five families in all. Matt, the fun single friend who is stationed in SC and was our coordinator and hostess with the mostest, Amelia and her baby boy Nathan (too cute) who was without her husband Dustin due to him being deployed in the desert (suck), Teresa and Aaron and their two darling little girls and Brent and Ingrid with their two little girls. It was a little girl festival plus one baby boy. We had this awesome and huge beach house with a pool, spa, plenty of room, a huge kitchen and entertaining area just a block from the coolest family beach with warm water, loads of seashells, perfect sand for castle making and little waves that were just the right size to gently knock over 4 year olds and produce squeals of laughter.



We got babysitters two nights of our trip and got to go out as adults which was so so so fun. We took a two hour walking tour of Charleston which was so amazing and then dined on fabulous seafood. Then, another night we went out for French food (yum) and enjoyed dessert on the roof of a historic hotel overlooking the harbor and lights of the city. Mike and I made fajitas one night and we hung out and visited. All of the boys played golf one day and the girls went to the spa the next day for massages and pedicures. We got to spend lots of time playing with the girls and they just had a blast swimming, going to the beach, doing art and playing with the other kids. Brent cooked an amazing breakfast, Matt's sister (the artist) did a painting class and art show with the kids and we loved the humid weather and heat.



It was a perfect vacation balanced with grown up time, family time, girl time, guy time and reconnecting with friends that we love and shared the hardest three years of our lives with. After too short of a visit, we drove and drove and drove again to Jacksonville, boarded a plane and flew to San Francisco where we stayed in a hotel until the morning and drove home.



The girls were amazing travelers. They slept on the plane rides and were happy the whole time and loved making new friends and getting time with the 4 of us. They decided they LOVE vacation time.



Stay tuned for vacation part 2 where we go to Utah!

Off we go...

We are going on a vacation. A real life, honest to goodness, family summer vacation. We have rented a house along the Atlantic coast with several wonderful friends we knew during Mike's residency. We will visit the beach, enjoy the pool, cook yummy dinners for each other and laugh a lot. We all have kids, sans Mattie the single guy and Amelia's husband Dustin is deployed to the desert but thankfully she and little Nathan are still coming to partake in our fun. The girls are so excited to live at the beach and go on an airplane and "help" me pack their suitcases. Right now, their suitcases have zebra purses, leapsters, a plastic guitar and yellow nemo foam kick boards for the pool in them. I asked them if they thought we should pack some panties, clothes and pajamas and they said I could throw in one pair of Hello Kitty panties and their princess pajamas and that would be all thank you. Ummmm....I don't think so little darlings. Mom still has full executive authority over packing. Speaking of packing...I better get crackin!

Pictures from vacation and funny stories coming soon.

Why?

It seems like it's all my kids ask me. Why why why why why WHY? I answer the endless sea of questions from "why does a red ICEE make my teeth red?" to "will I die someday?" Sometimes the very trivial question of "why does Barbie have yellow hair" precedes or follows the very type of question that stops me in my tracks like "can I have a lemonade stand next summer and give all the money I make at it to kids that are sick and in the hospital or to kids that don't have mommies or daddies and why don't they have them and why do kids get sick anyways????" I make up the answers as I go. I find myself saying "just because" or "because God made it that way" a lot. The point that I am doing a very poor job at making is that I am sick of questions. I sometimes sit with Mike late at night and beg him to please not ask me anything or make me decide anything for 20 minutes. Questions are the bane of my existence.

So when I got several messages in my inbox these past few weeks from strangers who have somehow stumbled upon this silly little corner of the Internet, I thought how NEAT! A lot of these questions ask the same thing..."why did you start a blog?" or "what inspired you to start a blog". Well. Um. Let's see.

My sister in law Amber told me what a blog was. I didn't even know. So she said, go to blogspot and sign on and we can post pictures of the kids so you don't have to mail them to me. Good idea, I thought. And then I wrote a post. And I hit the button "publish post". And later that night I showed Mike. And he liked what I wrote. And then a few days later I wrote a little essay about something that happened in our lives. I forget what. And when I hit the button "publish post" I felt this little thrill of exhilaration. I thought, wow, I just wrote something and ANYONE could read it if they wanted. It was a rush even though I knew Amber was the only one that knew I had a blog. So then I added my blog address to my email signature. And I started to write about personal stuff that was embarrassing. Ha!!! I felt free and liberated. Here I was being honest about my thoughts or bad habits and anyone in the world could be reading this and I wouldn't know it. It was so freeing to my soul. I found that I still loved writing. When I was younger I wrote all the time. I took writing classes and was Editor of my HS newspaper. I had a regular column where I could write on any topic I wanted. An early version of this blog? Maybe. And I discovered I still LOVED the idea of strangers reading what I wrote. I love to write. Sometimes I think a post is really well written. I don't go back and edit. Most of the time I don't even read the post before I publish it. I just write in a free-style format where I just put my ideas from my brain to my fingers to the screen. Sometimes I will go back and read what I wrote weeks later and think...OH MY GOSH, I can't believe I admitted that! Or I will blush with embarrassment and poor sentence structure, dangling participles, poor spelling and the switching of tense. But I don't let these things bug me. It's MY blog after all and if I want to dangle my participles all over the place I can. I love it and the fact that even one stranger would send me an email telling me that they liked this little bloggy thing makes me happier than the squirrel with the mouth full of nuts that I saw today in my parents tree. (How's that for poor sentence structure)

So anyway, that is why I write. It's why this blog isn't private. It would be stupid for me to say "this is my journal" or I write this for my kids. In part, I do. In part, I write it for Mike and for myself. I write it to embarrass my Mom who thinks I over share waaaay too much info. But it would be a lie to say that I don't hope that somewhere someone will read my words. I think words and stories are so powerful. I write because I have found that writing is part of who I need to be. I love it.