So I really dug down deep today to examine what I truly believe. Not as in what I am supposed to believe or what I should believe but what do I really, deep in my gut, down to my tippy toes, really, truly, madly believe in? The following is what I came up with. (Please keep in mind that my monthly visitor Veejay Singh will be making an appearance any day so this list was made while highly emotional. Yeah, so I call my period Veejay Singh, isn't that cute? I have my reasons that I will explain to you if you want to know, just email me. I can't post it.) Okay, here's what I truly deeply honestly most sincerely believe:
- I believe in parenthood. This may surprise you that this is first on my list. But the way I have changed inside since becoming a parent is so monumental that I can't even talk about it sometimes. And same with Mike. We were laying in bed on Saturday morning listening to the strains of Imagination Movers on Disney Channel and we agreed that it is so cool that we each feel exactly the same about our kids that we don't seem crazy obsessed to each other. Because let me tell you, if regular people knew how much me and Mike Meeker talk about our kids and spy on them and listen to them when they don't know and how many times we go in their room while they are sleeping and just sit on the floor and stare at their little sleeping forms by the light of the silvery moon, we would be locked in a padded room. FOR. SURE. We are stalkers. We stalk the lives of Katie and Jessica. And we love it.
- I believe in the healing power of Diet Coke. The other night, I was in my zone, cooking up a fabulous dinner for me, Mike Meeker, K, J and my parents. I got a little tired, a little winded and I chugged a Diet Coke straight out of the fridge. It was frosty. It was COLD. It was so good. And I instantly felt better. When I am on a road trip and I think, crap the desert will never end, or this road is so BORING, if I stop at a gas station and fill myself up with a 44 ouncer with extra extra crunchy type ice, I turn into a driving machine! I love Diet Coke. It has been there for me through many many many rough times. Whether it is over ice, straight out of the can, adorned with a cherry or lime or warm, flat and on my night stand, I just love it. I even love the can. Silver, black, red...obviously the three best colors ever. Look in my closet and you will understand.
- I believe in low maintenance friends. You know those friends that are all clingy and needy and are all "don't like that girl cuz she was so rude to me" or "why haven't you called me back?" or "do I look fat?" or "waaaa waaaa waaaa!"??? Those chicks don't really work for me. Look sister, if I wanted a girlfriend, I'd become a lesbian. I want a friend. Here's what they look like so you can snag some for yourself. They are in your life for good, no matter what. No matter if they haven't talked to you for six months or a year because you can't get your crap together. They know the real you, the quirks and the stuff you suck at and they love you anyway. They call you on your crap and when you hurt them they let you know. Then, after you say sorry, they forgive you. And they don't hold a grudge. They would get on a plane in the middle of the night if you needed them. And you would get on a plane in the middle of the night if they needed you. But you know that unless a child or husband dies, you won't have to pay that much for a plane ticket. They aren't superduper skinny. When you see them, no matter how long it's been, you are so happy and at some point in time during the visit at least once you will do the following: laugh so hard you can't speak and you clutch your stomach and you will cry your eyes out.
- I believe that Jesus is my Savior and is the Savior of the world. I really do you guys. I believe He truly lived. I believe He taught people to be kinder and more loving. I believe He taught us to fight our natural tendency to be jealous, petty, judgemental and intolerant. He spent most of His time with people that were cast out from normal society and were considered immoral and bad. He loved them and taught them His gospel of love, peace and hope. I believe that this stuff really truly happened. I don't believe it's a fairytale or some story that Christians made up. I believe He suffered and died for all of our sins and I believe He rose from the dead and came back to teach people more about what is truly important. I believe He did this willingly because He loves us. I believe that we can get through anything in life if we turn to Him and allow the miracle of His atonement to truly work in our lives. I believe this 100%. There's a poem that Carol Lerwill, the kindest of ladies, gave to me when I was 18 and I carry to this day inside my scriptures. When I feel overwhelmed and unsure I turn to it. It says, "I know only as much of the world and God, as a creature with two eyes must. What I understand I love and what I don't understand, I trust." I am far from a perfect Christian. I struggle daily make my life reflect what I believe. But it doesn't mean at the end of the day that I don't believe it. Know what I mean jelly bean?
- I believe in shopping online for children's clothes: I took K&J shopping for clothes on Saturday night. LUCKILY, my Mom came with us. She ended up pushing them in a cart to the toy aisle or around and around the store while I shopped for their clothes. I THOUGHT that they were getting older so maybe they could come in a dressing room and try some stuff on. I was buying clothes for fall/winter and didn't quite know what length they needed in pants, how much of a waist they might have and what size of shoes would be perfect for shoes to be worn with tights vs. shoes to be worn with socks. I envisioned a fun, multi-generational girls night of shopping. Giggling in the dressing room, oo's and ah's when something was just too too cute to pass up. It didn't happen. The girls hated it. I hated it. I still ended up coming home with clothes that don't fit them and they did not see the inside of a dressing room. It was horrible. I have so much more fun and I get way better deals when I just stick to shopping online after they go to bed.
- I believe in straight leg jeans. All this skinny leg, boot cut, flare crap is just too much. Straight leg jeans look good on everyone. You might think you look good in flare jeans but unless you are a size 2, you don't. Skinny leg jeans look good on a lot of people as long as for every 10 pounds you weigh over super model size you add one inch of shirt length and add one size to your jeans. Do not squeeze into skinny jeans if your size comes in more than one digit. And the chubbier you are the darker the denim you must wear in all cuts. But to be safe, everyone from size 0 (I know no one at this size) to size whatever (I know a lot of people at this size) just get dark denim, straight leg jeans. And unless you are positive that you have a fabulous butt, cover it a little. It can't hurt to be sure.
- I believe in eating quality food: This does not mean healthy food. It means quality. We only have so many meals to consume in life. Let's enjoy them. Let's eat artfully prepared, flavorful, creative, fun dishes. Let's experience cuisine from every corner of the globe. Let's linger over our meals with good conversation, sipping our Diet Cokes and laughing. Let's talk about our day, both the good parts and the bad over a great salad and fabulous plate of pasta. Let's put down the fast food cardboard that we eat in our cars while trying to get everything done. Let's slow down, dine on white plates, sample vegetables and fruit in every color of the rainbow, sink our teeth into something prepared with love whether it is curry beef from your favorite Thai place or your Mom's meatloaf. And if while we are enjoying our food if we could try and eat smaller portions and make it healthy...all the better. But that's not necessarily what I truly believe in. But I do truly, deep down in my heart believe that crappy food is such a waste. When I eat something in my car on the go and I don't taste it and am glad I didn't because it was in all honesty crap on a cracker, I am so sad because I should have stopped at the grocery store, bought a perfect piece of fruit and some fabulous cheese and I would have been so much happier.
- I believe football is a problem in my marriage. When I married Mike, he knew not of football. He was raised in a household where the Dad did not like football. The family did not watch television on Sundays. It was not allowed. When we got married, I was a football FAN. I loved the San Francisco 49ers and the Stanford Cardinals. They were my boys. I knew A LOT about football. I could name the players, the coaches, the mascots and I could tell you how everyone was doing most of the season. I thought this made me extra cute to boys. I was the cool football girl. I was giving off the signal that if you dated me you wouldn't have to worry about being dragged to some chick flick and having to examine our relationship all night long. We could catch a game, maybe even eat some nachos. But alas, my new husband Mike Meeker did not care. He was a baseball fan. "Come", I said to him, "give football a try." He began to watch. He watched some more. Mikey likey. Fast forward 17 years. Mike records HOURS of college ball on Saturday, NFL on Sunday, sports center, college game day final and all the other analyzing type Chris The Devil Berman shows and it has become the BANE OF MY EXISTENCE. I hate football now. I don't want to watch it or hear about it or know about it. I get itchy when football season approaches. (Except for Troy Polamalu because how can you not? The guy is an animal) And Mike reminds me every year that I can not say anything to him about his love of football because I made him watch it and it's all my fault that I created a monster. I gave unto my husband football and he did watch. I hate it when that happens.
- I believe in bed time. I used to be a night owl. I have been known in college to frequent the Denny's at three. In the morning. Oh yeah, I was a bad ass. Now, if it is past my kids' bedtime and they are not in bed I get this panic, heart palpation feeling inside. Bedtime must be observed. Because if their bedtime gets pushed back, guess what? That's right. My bed time gets pushed back and that is where the real sweaty armpits and panic attacks start happening. Because, and they don't tell you this before you have a kid, no matter what time you put the little suckers to bed, they will get up at exactly the same time in the morning. Yep. Just because you let them stay up, it does not translate into them sleeping in. Apparently, when you are 4 and you open your eyes in the morning you think the world is bright and full of fun and possibility so you just pop out of bed all happy and ready to take on the day. When do they get to the age where they wake up like a normal person and realize if I hit the snooze button and get an extra 20 minutes of sleep that it will probably be the best 20 minutes of my day?
I believe in a lot of other things too. I gotta go watch Dancing With The Stars in like two minutes because Derek Hough and Maxim Smirkovski are hawt.
Thank you and goodnight.
P to the S: Donny Osmond? Who knew?
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