Dad Day

What would my life be like without fathers in it? On Mothers Day, I was happy to be celebrating motherhood and womanhood in all it's shapes, colors and sizes. Then I went through the last six weeks unable to walk. Suddenly, the word "Fathers" has taken on a whole new meaning. Mike has stepped forward to be all things to all people in an amazing way. He has continued to work three or more days/week, has taken care of the girls the other four days/week and every night. He has provided meals, shuttled the girls to school, dance class, to appointments and has driven me to physical therapy and other appointments. He has bathed them, learned how to do pig-tails, washed clothes, changed sheets, done dishes all while playing with them for what seems to me like endless hours upon hours. Every time I hobble my way out to the family room with my walker, I witness girls laughing, pillows flying, races being raced, games being played, pictures being drawn, playdough being molded, snuggling being had on the couch and snacks being consumed. I think Jessica's gift to Mike for Fathers Day sums up how we all have felt about spending so much time with Mike over the last weeks. She chose a Boston Red Sox baseball hat on it, because it had a letter "B" on it. And when I asked her why she chose that hat she said "Because it stands for "Be Home" like Daddy has been home with us since your operation and I always want him to be home". I could never thank Mike enough for all he has done for us over the past weeks. There are times in the past 17 years that I have thought to myself "how did I get here?" and not in a good way. I think everyone has those moments. But I have had more moments when I have wondered "how am I continuing to fool him into thinking I'm worth it?" I have to say, that I feel like my love for Mike has grown so much in the past few weeks. I guess there's just something about a man in a desert camouflage uniform with an apron on bringing you breakfast in bed that warms my heart!!! I am looking forward to walking again but the girls and I will miss Mike so much when life returns to normal.


And then, I think of my Dad. Anyone who has known me just smiled right now. Everyone smiles when they think of my Dad. His stable influence in my life continues to hugely impact me today. He has helped me so much always, but especially since we moved back to California. Just in the past weeks, he has driven the girls to school, watched them for me, gone to the movies with them, brought me meals, kept the girls (along with my mom) overnight, made sure the girls had shoes that fit, made sure I had everything I needed and is taking the girls on vacation with my Mom this week. My Dad stayed home with me when I was sick as a kid, coached my softball and powder puff football teams, drove car loads of girls to and from the skating rink and slumber parties, was cool enough to drop me off down the street when I was sooooooo embarrassed of him at age 13, cooked countless meals, spent hours playing catch in the yard, drove on countless Sunday drives as a family, took me to a million movies just me and him, helps me with any home project around here that Mike is too busy to do or that happened when he was deployed and he is the best Papa two little girls could ever have. The girls love their Papa so much. They think he is their own personal playmate. Katie always tells me she is going to marry her Papa because he has a truck and he can drive her home and if she gets married to Papa she can live at his house and that is her favorite house in the world. My Dad is just great. I think if you can be great at something, being a great Dad is pretty awesome.

So to all the Dads out there, keep on doing what you do. It matters more than any award at work or sporting event on TV or success at any hobby you might wish you had more time in which to devote. Your kids are paying attention. They'll remember that one time they were sick and you brought them special colored pencils and paper to draw with or that one Valentines Day you bought them a toothbrush with hearts on it or all the nights you bring home a chocolate milkshake with three straws so the three of you can share it. There is nothing that can replace a great Father.

Oh those Meeker girls just crack me up!

So since I currently have NO life being stuck in healing positions 1,2and3 after surgery, I thought I would do some careful observing of Katie and Jessica and share some recent funnyness.

• Katie has recently read Donald Trump's book "The Art of the Deal" and has made it her personal mission statement. She starts her sentence with "Mom, I have a great idea do you want to know what it is? (super excited voice) "Sure Katie tell me", I say. Then she'll say something "Wouldn't it be fun to eat our cupcakes before dinner so we could be silly and really laugh about it?" Or she'll say "My idea is to have sissy and me go into our room for a nap and as long we play quietly that wouldn't be so bad right?" She is making deals and talking people into everything from taking her places, letting her stay up late, letting her just about get anything she wants. And because of the way she presents it, you sometimes feel happy about going along with the plan until later when you are sitting on the couch and realized you got hustled, conned, scam-a-ram-a-boom-banged by a curly haired four year old.
• Jessica and I were having a very loving and deep conversation after naptime. She put her head on me and said "Mama, there have been 10 good things that have happened because of your operation and 10 not so good things. Let's make a list" I said okay let's do it. Then she said "The best thing, the very bestest most wonderful thing that happened because of your operation was that Daddy got to go to our Mothers Day party at preschool because you needed help getting around and no other daddys got to go but our daddy. That was the best thing that happened cuz of your operation. I said, "well, I can see how that would be awesome, but another good thing is that my leg is going to get better right" And she patted my arm like okay sweetie whatever you say and then said "Another best thing is that we got to spend a lot of time with Daddy because he took days off work! And I'm like "Mmm hmm, hanging out with Dad is the best, but also isn't it great that I won't have to walk with it hurting?" Her response was "Yes it is because you can play with us and Daddy now." Does anyone else notice a common thread? Think the kid is in love with her Dad? Just a bit.
• The girls have taken to picking out their clothes. Jessica wore a violet shade of purple Tshirt and turquoise/aqua sweat pants and purple tennis shoes today. And she thought she looked gorgeous. She looked at best "refugee chic". Katie wanted to wear a hideous fake rose in her hair and a cream silk headband that has a organza bow attached to it. She also wanted to wear green socks but had nothing green on. I was like "whatever, if you think you look good go for it." But I gotta say I'm glad the school year is ending because the outfits they pick are not so hot.
• The curtain broke in the formal living room. Okay it did not break. It was broken by two adorable sweet demolition experts that live in my house. When my Mom asked Katie how it got broken she said "You know Grammie, sometimes you just sit down and things break." Yes Katie they do. Especially after you had spent two weeks pulling on the curtains until the screws that kept the rod up came out.
• Mike was talking about something work related and at the end of the conversation he said "I know I gotta do it but I'm just pissed about it." And Jessica came up to him and said "Daddy what does piss mean?" And we said "it means upset but it's better for you to say upset and not say the word piss because it is not a nice word and it's not for little girls to say that word." And she goes "But Daddy if I tell someone I am pissed, then I can explain that piss means upset!" I think Mike and I will be talking in our secret parent code for the next few years.
• Notice the title of the post was Meeker Girls, so I fall into that category also. I have to use a walker to get from point A to point B. When I'm all alone at the house and nobody (not even Mike) is around, I pretend I am a 90 year old lady and I talk to myself. Today I said this and then laughed for like 20 minutes "Ahhhh lawsy. I lost my glasses. Ethel, Judy have you seen my glasses? I can't get my hair rolled and set today if I don't find those dad gum glasses. Oh here they are on my head. Well isn't that just pretty as a picture?" Seriously, did this out loud in my house, nobody was there but I was laughing my hiney off.

Breaking News...no pun intended

So I went to the surgeon today for a follow up on Miss Knee. He told me my range of motion was great, much better than he expected. (yay) I told him I was being the ever obedient patient and keeping my leg in the brace and not putting pressure on my leg and doing mild stretching exercises and that I was only taking pain medicine at night right before bedtime if my leg was really hurting. (yay) I then looked at him with hopeful eyes and said "so ummm...what are my physical limitations at this point in regards to ummmm...driving and walking?" And he was all..."oh. you can't drive for at least 4 more weeks. And you can't walk without a walker or crutches for at least 4-6 more weeks. " (no yay) And I said "come again?" And he said "the bone has to heal and grow into the grooves in the screws we put in your leg or you could just strip the screws right out of place and cause a very bad break in your leg." (no yay) And I said..."say what?" And he said "look idiot. Did you not hear me when I told you this was a 6-9 month recovery period?" (fer sure no yay) and I was all "Well Mr. Surgeon sir, I guess did not hear that part thank you very much." (still no yay) And he said "Get out of my office. No walking. No driving. No jumping for joy. No life. Got it?" And I was all "got it dill hole." (sarcastic yay)

The End

P.S. None of this actually happened except for the fact I can't drive for 4 weeks and can't walk without a walker for 4-6 more weeks and I have to go to tons of PT. Everything else in the above post is my attempt at satire because if I can't be snarky and sarcastic I will die.

Out Of Touch Friday Confessions...(on a Saturday)

Boy I feel out of touch with the world. My life feels all upside down and backwards. My roots are gray people. Gray hair on my head. And I need some serious retail therapy, lunch out and park time with the girls. One large order of Vitamin D please. But what's better than a healthy dose of Friday confessions (on a Saturday) to put things in perspective. Let's get started shall we?

• Well obviously we'll start with the decline of my personal care and grooming. The aforementioned gray hair, prickly legs, scratchy feet and I don't think the girls have seen a brassiere in like weeks. It is unacceptable.
• I find myself frustrated with people. My love for my parents, my husband and my daughters has increased during this time. But I find that I am finding fault with other individuals in my life much quicker than my normal snarky self. There are individuals (okay just one) that I want to pull by the hair and slap. The level of irritation I have towards this person is hard to take because I truly love them and I will not be expressing my irritation because I know it is just a product of my frustration with being cooped up. But still, it bothers me to think badly of someone I love. If you are reading this, it's not you...I swear. Unless it is you. But what are the chances of that?
• I reeeeeeaaaaalllly did not want to gain weight during this time. It would be super easy to do given that I am just sitting around all day doing no physical exercise. So the first four weeks I was really careful with what I ate. Then I went to the doctors and found out I had lost 12 pounds. So now I have been having a hot burning passionate love affair with Hershey's Nuggets in milk chocolate. The problem with this is that the nuggets are like three hershey's kisses in size. They don't have that hard to unwrap foil that surround the kisses therefore you can get them into your mouth at a much faster rate. And the kisses at least poke the roof of your mouth so you eventually have to stop due to roof of mouth pain. The nuggets do not cause any pain at all. And they are more delicious than you can ever imagine. Thus, my affair continues. Me and the nuggets are burning up the sheets. It must be stopped immediately.
• Trash fiction - I have gone through my reading list of books I wanted to read post surgery. Some were fluff but others were books I have always wanted to want to read and I figured if I stuck them in my nightstand I might be tempted to crack them open when stuck here for hours on end. So I did and it worked. I've read them all. Now, I have resorted to re-reading trash fiction that I had thrown in the donation bin. You know the kind where "her bosom heaved with unreleased desire" or "he unsheathed his manhood and..." well you know how it goes. So between the chocolate, the gray hair and the late night reading about the brutish Scottish Lord who claims the virgin maid as his prisoner in order for her father to surrender the land that was his by birthright - I am in sad shape. Give me a couple of cats and some gray socks and call it a freakin day.
• I didn't do a shout out to my brother in law Chuck on his birthday which was two days ago. I love Chuck. I shall remedy this by the end of the weekend with proper birthday postings.
• My daughters put on many plays yesterday while Mike filmed them. They rehearsed and performed all while I had no idea any of it was going on. I got to watch the movie version last night. I felt sad and disconnected and impatient. I tried to make them redo their play this morning and they were not in the mood.
• I have been bad about wearing my leg brace. It goes from my hip to my ankle and I just got to the point where I couldn't take it anymore. So I am trying to lay with my leg very straight. Do you think that will work?

The Tonight Show

When Mike was a little boy, he'd go to bed at an appropriate bedtime and lay awake worrying about this or that. As time ticked by and the night grew later, he would start to hear his Dad, out in the living room, chuckle. The chuckle got louder and pretty soon, full on laughter could be heard coming from the family room. Mike would wonder what in the world could be causing his Dad to laugh harder than he ever did around the family. Before long, curiosity would overtake him and he would begin to sneak out of his room. He would crawl on his belly, the way GI JOE would crawl through the mud on the commercial. He would crawl behind the sofa and peek out from behind to see what his Dad was laughing at. There on their small color TV would be Johnny Carson and Mike didn't quite understand the jokes but he would silently giggle along with his Dad. Before long, a commercial would come on and he would scurry back to his room and eventually fall asleep.

The year Mike and I got married, Johnny Carson retired as the host of the Tonight Show. I remember the last show with Johnny Carson when Bette Midler sang One For the Road. It seemed like the whole world stopped what they were doing to bid farewell to Johnny Carson.

So when Leno bid farewell last Friday, Mike and I set up to record the final episode and figured we would feel the same sentimentality that we did 17 years ago. But as much as I wanted to feel something, I felt flat, uninterested, meh. I asked Mike why we weren't feeling anything about Jay leaving and he said it was probably because we didn't care. Good answer Mike. Glad I asked you. Way to be there for me. So I called my Mom and asked her why I felt so blah about Jay Leno leaving and she explained that Johnny Carson was the host for-EVER like as in 30 years. But Jay was only the host for 17 years and Johnny was the host during your childhood. You don't remember a time when Johnny Carson wasn't on TV. So it's natural that you would feel more sentimental. Ohhhhhh. That helped me a little bit.

But now, I have watched two episodes of The Tonight Show with Conan O'Brian and I realize none of this was the case. It's just that I love Conan. I really truly do.

Magic Dust

Dear Katie and Jessica:

I know I wrote to you on your birthdays and that it wasn't so long ago. But as I watched you walk the hallway of our home tonight, your pajamas seemed too short for your legs and rode up when you lifted your arms. The cadence in which you walked seemed more elongated and the questions you asked seemed more...I don't know...thoughtful. You both cleared your plates tonight without being asked and threw your trash in the garbage. We have moved past bottom wiping, clothes dressing and today you both selected and attached the hair bows you wanted to wear to preschool. I have always heard parents say about their children, "they grow up so quickly, you blink and one day they are in college." So I want you guys to know that I appreciate moments in your life that are not monumental or considered milestones. Throwing your trash away can't compare with the day you took your first step or said Mama for the first time. I know the day you go off on a school bus will be bitter sweet and I will remember it forever. But I want you to know that I will also remember nights like tonight. A Tuesday night in which we had Chicken Sonora from Dinner My Way. I still can't walk from my knee surgery. Dad has a bad cold. And I will remember you both in the half light of the hallway in pajamas that you have outgrown just a bit asking me what I thought your dance teacher will teach you tomorrow at dance class. When I told you she might teach you how to skip on your tip toes, you laughed and said you already knew how to do that and then proceeded to show me as you traveled the rest of the hallway to your bedroom. It is past 11pm. You both should be long asleep by now. But you have been quietly visiting since lights out. I have listened at your door tonight and heard words like "magical" and "ghosts" and "rainbows" and "dancing" and "let's pretend". These are the words of childhood. Pretty soon I will need to teach you more about being alert regarding strangers, body parts that are private, riding your bikes on the sidewalk and why girls are mean at school. With each of these lessons some of the magical dust that covers children gets swept away until one day you are all grown up. When that happens I just need you to know that you guys really were kids once upon a time and I will do my very best to make your childhood awesome and keep the magic dust around for as long as I possibly can.

Love,
Mama