- Rolle (French Bistro/market) This is one of the best little finds in all of Sacramento. It is on 54th and H street. It opened 10 years ago as a french market with just a couple of tables. Now there are about 10 tables and they serve the best country rustic french food around. I had the best creme brulee (blueberry) that I've ever had and Mike had a satisfying chocolate mousse. (it was no pot au creme from Blvd Bistro but it was okay) But the food is the real star. The owner smokes fresh salmon four different ways. I recommend the hot, cooked smoked salmon. He also roasts marinated prawns that are to die for. His hot sandwiches like Croque Monsieur (ham/cheese) or the hot salmon sandwich and the salads are the reasons to go. Order the chilled prawns appetizer and dig into the creme fraiche with dill with your crusty baguette. Lunch is under $10 per person. Go after 1 for no wait. Expect to wait for a table between 12 and 1. Order your food as takeout and go over to a park and enjoy a picnic!
- The Mentalist - I've been watching the reruns because I didn't watch it originally. It's good! I still can't figure out what that dude was in though.
- Perrier with Lime and ice.
- Fall - just the idea of cooler weather makes me happy.
- Lee Jeans - the tummy panel is awesome!
- Roses - pink ones in a glass vase.
Sunday, August 30, 2009
Raindrops on Roses and Whiskers on Kittens...
It's time for a few of my favorite things list. I did a summer edition a few months back so we'll call this My Favorite Things Summer edition 2.0.
Thursday, August 27, 2009
The What When Why and How?
I've received a lot of email about why I was in the hospital and offered prayers and expressions of love. These mean a lot to me. So here's what happened in short little summary.
Over the past six to eight weeks I've been feeling sick to my stomach and having intestinal disturbances (a polite way of putting it) every day. My primary doctor and my GI specialist ran tests and couldn't find anything. But I was still getting sick everyday. My day would be cruising along just fine and then, whamo...I'd get sick. So on the 17th of August, I pulled a muscle in my side from throwing up so hard. I called my doctor in the morning and she and my specialist told me to go to the hospital to get admitted. So I went on Tuesday the 18th and they began what would turn out to be 9 days of tests and boredom. They determined that I have Inflammatory Intestinal Disease and they have put me on eight different medications, causing me to have to take 27 pills per day. Yes, I said 27. Most medications are for things like Crohn's disease, however, I don't have an confirmed Crohn's diagnosis. But now I'm working with my doctors to treat the symptoms of this condition and hoping to get used to the medications and that they help me return to a normal life. This has been a super hard year for me and I am hoping it gets a lot better from here on in.
So that's the story, it's nothing dramatic or exciting. But I thank you for your thoughts and kind words, calls and email.
Over the past six to eight weeks I've been feeling sick to my stomach and having intestinal disturbances (a polite way of putting it) every day. My primary doctor and my GI specialist ran tests and couldn't find anything. But I was still getting sick everyday. My day would be cruising along just fine and then, whamo...I'd get sick. So on the 17th of August, I pulled a muscle in my side from throwing up so hard. I called my doctor in the morning and she and my specialist told me to go to the hospital to get admitted. So I went on Tuesday the 18th and they began what would turn out to be 9 days of tests and boredom. They determined that I have Inflammatory Intestinal Disease and they have put me on eight different medications, causing me to have to take 27 pills per day. Yes, I said 27. Most medications are for things like Crohn's disease, however, I don't have an confirmed Crohn's diagnosis. But now I'm working with my doctors to treat the symptoms of this condition and hoping to get used to the medications and that they help me return to a normal life. This has been a super hard year for me and I am hoping it gets a lot better from here on in.
So that's the story, it's nothing dramatic or exciting. But I thank you for your thoughts and kind words, calls and email.
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
He was just SEVENTEEN, you know what I MEAN...
I should have posted this on Saturday. However, on Saturday, I was stuck on the 4th floor of the UCD Med Center in the middle of a zillion and one tests (more on that later). Saturday was the occasion of my seventeenth anniversary of marriage to Mikey. Normally, I would have posted my best Emily Dickinson style post, waxing romantically about all the reasons I love Mike Meeker. However, this year I'd like to express a more authentic sentiment to my beloved. I'd like to express the reasons I REALLY love him, rather than the frilly fluff I would normally be want to blather on about. I thought a bullet list would be appropriate, because 17 years of marriage and bullets...they just seem to go together don't they?
- Saturday is a perfect example of why I love Mike. I sat in the hospital and he brought my favorite pink roses to my bedside. He brought himself, in a funny mood, cracking old jokes and stories and cheering me up in a subtle way that he knew would work but not be over the top cheesy. He took care of the babes without complaint and made me feel cared for and loved and carried the weight of our responsibilities. He got no card, no present, no dinner out...just gave of himself and his time. This is life married to Mike.
- The only gift I could think to give to Mike is to let him off the hook in regards to coming back to the hospital that night with the girls to visit. They had napped late so it would have taken a lot of effort to dress them, load them, unload them, visit, keep them quiet, load them back in the car, get them home and to bed. Instead, I told him to just enjoy the evening, set the girls up with a movie and take the night off. Instead, he and the girls had a football pizza party. They stuck baseball hats on backward, ordered a pizza, ate it on the couch while watching football. When pizza was done, they got out their nerf football and played four downs each of tackle football in the living room using pillows to break their falls. Mike was so excited when he called that he had taught the girls a shuttle pass that they could do to work together to score a touchdown. He also taught them how to come at him from two different sides so they could take him down easier. Then they rested on the couch and watched the rest of the game. He said he had the best night and that while they were eating the end of the pizza that Katie exclaimed "this is the BEST NIGHT EVER!" Mike and his girls, it's a huge part of why I love him.
- He gets me water in the middle of the night. Always has, always will. It was a promise he made and he totally kept it.
- He manages our money. We would be in jail if it was left to me to manage. I am so thankful he does this because I suck with money.
- He takes out the garbage and never forgets. I realized what a big deal this is when he was in Afghanistan. I forgot all the time.
- He gets the mail. I also hate to do this. The mail carrier rang my doorbell when it got so full she couldn't stuff anymore mail in there when he was gone. He gets it everyday and is excited for me when my People Magazine comes.
- He has the best taste in movies. He loves Braveheart and Shawshank and Top Gun just like all guys do but he also loves Sense and Sensibility and Sleepless in Seattle and he's not afraid to quote lines from the chickiest of chick flicks.
- He likes Broadway musicals and he's not gay. He had never seen a musical live before we got married. At the end of Les Miserables when they sing "...will you join in our crusade?..." he always stands up and shouts "YES I WILL" at the top of his lungs. It's embarrassing but he loves it and I love that about him.
- We fight. We have gotten in big fights where he has fled to sleep in the bathroom tub with blankets because it was the only place he could find that I wouldn't be able to follow. Now however, we will be super mad and he'll say..."we are too old to have this fight. Can we just please go to bed and agree that we are both super mad and finish fighting tomorrow?" I love this about him because the fight is always over once we get a good night's sleep.
- He's not scared of me. Don't tell him this is something I like because officially I miss the days where he used to be scared of me, but secretly I'm glad the score is more even.
- He likes me for me. He knows my good, bad, ugly, fat, bloated, sick, well, glammed up, scummed out sides and he loves all of them.
- He calls me on my crap. He doesn't let me get...well...bitchy. He'll tell me I'm wrong if I hurt someones feelings. He doesn't always take my side.
- And the best thing. He loves the Lord. He wants to do what's right. That doesn't mean he always does what is right, but it eats at him when he doesn't. His core is good and he tries to be a good father, a good husband and serve his patients and co-workers and family and friends. This spreads him too thin to do it all perfectly and I love that he cares and vows to try and do better. He always has something he wants to do better when I am more inclined to just give up and say "good enough". Mike isn't happy with good enough.
So these reasons may not inspire any sonnets and are very un-Shakespeare-esque. But they are my reasons and they are true and real. Our life isn't perfect but I can honestly say I would not change who I chose to spend it with and I think after 17 years that's pretty darn good.
Saturday, August 22, 2009
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
Monday, August 17, 2009
Courage All Around
Lately, it seems like everywhere I look, stories of courage keep popping up around me. One month ago, Katie and Jessica could not be in the pool without us holding them tightly. Now, they jump off the side, submerge themselves underwater and swim to the steps or the side of the pool. Katie spends more time under water than above it. As we watched them graduate from Starfish class and immerse themselves in Seahorse swim class, I saw real courage as they made the choice to let go and submerge themselves underneath the cool water. I watched as they let go of their teacher and made their way toward safety, in water over their heads, all alone. I've watched as my Grandmother, at the advanced age of 89, left her home that she's had since the 1950's and enter an Assisted Living Facility. She went from a three bedroom home to a one bedroom apartment. A woman who cooked for a living and for a family of 6 her whole life, now does not have a stove. She knew not a soul in the place. But she faced this transition bravely, has made a gaggle of friends and is loving her life. Her only regret, she tells us, is that she didn't move there sooner. My sister in law had a new baby while her husband prepares to apply to Law School. My other sister in law has kept her family going in a strange town while my brother in law travels for the Air Force. My brother in law broke up with a girl he really liked because it just wasn't the right girl for him and he knew it. The girls' preschool teacher danced in our local Struass Festival in a festooned candy pink ballgown, in front of hundreds of people from all over the state. My mother in law held the hand of her baby sister as she ended her courageous battle against cancer. All of these acts of courage might normally get chalked up to life experiences. But in them, I see courage that brings me to tears.
So when I became aware of the most tremendous act of courage I have heard of ever, I had to write about it. Many of you might have already heard this story so hang in there with me while I give a brief recap. Arizona couple, Christian and Stephanie Nielsen were in a private plane crash one year ago. Stephanie is the author of the Nie Nie Dialogues, a mommy blog, that chronicled her life of raising her four children and loving being a wife and a mother. Her blog was filled with love letters to her husband and depicted family celebrations for birthdays and special achievements, fashion shows of back to school clothes, bike rides and New Years Eve parties. She encouraged the wearing of red lipstick and the enjoyment of simple things like glitter, high heels and the letting go of helium balloons with messages attached to the strings. They were vegetarians, beautiful and the epitome of health. Stephanie gave her husband flying lessons for his birthday. They crashed in a small plane with their flight instructor. The flight instructor died. Christian was burned on something like 30% of his body. Stephanie was burned on over 80% of her body. She should not have survived and was in a coma for months. There are a million stories of courage I could share with you about this amazing family. Stephanie's sister has the most amazing blog called cjane enjoy it. Both her blog and Stephanie's are linked on the right side of this blog. Trust me, once you go there, you'll never come back here. cjane is a true essayist. Her blog is a treasure of beautiful prose, hilarious stories, fashion and coolness. Stephanie has kept up her blog since she awoke from her coma, sharing her new reality with her readers in an open manner that will make you weep. So as you can imagine, there are many stories of courage, love and heroism. However, this past Saturday, a story emerged that has made me weep with sorrow, joy and awe since I read about it.
Stephanie grew up in Provo, Utah. In Provo, there is a big white stone letter "Y" up on the side of a mountain on the East side of town. (The "Y" is for the local college BYU) You can't live in Provo without hiking to the Y at least once. I lived there for 18 months and I hiked there exactly that many times, once. You have two choices when hiking to the Y. You can hike up a series of switchbacks on the trail, or you can just head straight on up. Straight up is much harder but shorter, the switchbacks being easier but taking much longer. I always thought the people who chose the switchbacks were dumb. Why drag out the pain? Just hype yourself up and go for it. Then I tried the straight up route. I quickly found myself on a switchback trail, with an ache in my side and a new understanding of the value in slow and steady progress. Anyway, back to Stephanie. Growing up, she hiked to the Y daily with her dogs. It was her special place. After waking up from her coma, being transferred to the burn unit in Utah, finally being released from the hospital etc etc, she went to visit her beloved trail. She made it to the trail head before she had to turn back. She set a personal goal to hike to the Y by the one year anniversary of the crash. In addition to working toward this goal, she has been trying to work up the courage to post a picture of herself on her blog. On Saturday, she did both. Let me tell you, once you spend some time reading about this family, you will understand the miracle in these two achievements. I will not post a picture of Stephanie here because I think she should be able to do that on her terms and I feel it's sort of invasive. But let me say here and now that her demonstrations of bravery have changed the way I walk in the world.
If you are lacking inspiration or you feel like your problems are insurmountable, take some time to read Stephanie's story. I recommend starting with the time before the crash. Then, switch to cjane for updates after the crash and a story of heroism all it's own. Finally, go back to Stephanie when she starts writing again. You won't be sorry. Instead of going and buying a new book, read these instead. They are free and are so much better than any book you could buy. Have your Kleenex ready.
So when I became aware of the most tremendous act of courage I have heard of ever, I had to write about it. Many of you might have already heard this story so hang in there with me while I give a brief recap. Arizona couple, Christian and Stephanie Nielsen were in a private plane crash one year ago. Stephanie is the author of the Nie Nie Dialogues, a mommy blog, that chronicled her life of raising her four children and loving being a wife and a mother. Her blog was filled with love letters to her husband and depicted family celebrations for birthdays and special achievements, fashion shows of back to school clothes, bike rides and New Years Eve parties. She encouraged the wearing of red lipstick and the enjoyment of simple things like glitter, high heels and the letting go of helium balloons with messages attached to the strings. They were vegetarians, beautiful and the epitome of health. Stephanie gave her husband flying lessons for his birthday. They crashed in a small plane with their flight instructor. The flight instructor died. Christian was burned on something like 30% of his body. Stephanie was burned on over 80% of her body. She should not have survived and was in a coma for months. There are a million stories of courage I could share with you about this amazing family. Stephanie's sister has the most amazing blog called cjane enjoy it. Both her blog and Stephanie's are linked on the right side of this blog. Trust me, once you go there, you'll never come back here. cjane is a true essayist. Her blog is a treasure of beautiful prose, hilarious stories, fashion and coolness. Stephanie has kept up her blog since she awoke from her coma, sharing her new reality with her readers in an open manner that will make you weep. So as you can imagine, there are many stories of courage, love and heroism. However, this past Saturday, a story emerged that has made me weep with sorrow, joy and awe since I read about it.
Stephanie grew up in Provo, Utah. In Provo, there is a big white stone letter "Y" up on the side of a mountain on the East side of town. (The "Y" is for the local college BYU) You can't live in Provo without hiking to the Y at least once. I lived there for 18 months and I hiked there exactly that many times, once. You have two choices when hiking to the Y. You can hike up a series of switchbacks on the trail, or you can just head straight on up. Straight up is much harder but shorter, the switchbacks being easier but taking much longer. I always thought the people who chose the switchbacks were dumb. Why drag out the pain? Just hype yourself up and go for it. Then I tried the straight up route. I quickly found myself on a switchback trail, with an ache in my side and a new understanding of the value in slow and steady progress. Anyway, back to Stephanie. Growing up, she hiked to the Y daily with her dogs. It was her special place. After waking up from her coma, being transferred to the burn unit in Utah, finally being released from the hospital etc etc, she went to visit her beloved trail. She made it to the trail head before she had to turn back. She set a personal goal to hike to the Y by the one year anniversary of the crash. In addition to working toward this goal, she has been trying to work up the courage to post a picture of herself on her blog. On Saturday, she did both. Let me tell you, once you spend some time reading about this family, you will understand the miracle in these two achievements. I will not post a picture of Stephanie here because I think she should be able to do that on her terms and I feel it's sort of invasive. But let me say here and now that her demonstrations of bravery have changed the way I walk in the world.
If you are lacking inspiration or you feel like your problems are insurmountable, take some time to read Stephanie's story. I recommend starting with the time before the crash. Then, switch to cjane for updates after the crash and a story of heroism all it's own. Finally, go back to Stephanie when she starts writing again. You won't be sorry. Instead of going and buying a new book, read these instead. They are free and are so much better than any book you could buy. Have your Kleenex ready.
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
Reunited and it feels so good...
Here I am, in all my reunion splendor. My hair was curled in ringlets but in this picture I have somehow pushed my bangs back from my head making it look ridiculous. So imagine this picture with cute bangs. And imagine me with a tan instead of ghostly white. Oh, and imagine I squeezed in time to get my teeth bleached okay? And might you also squint your eyes a bit to see those workouts I meant to get in and those wrinkles I actually don't have? Thanks. You are a peach. 
So...2o years. 1989. The FIRST George Bush became President, the Soviet Union - Afghanistan war ended when the USSR left Kabul, Exxon Valdez spilled in Alaska, Rain Man won best picture, Tianamen Square, Seinfeld & The Simpsons premiered on TV, Gameboys came out, Menendez brothers, 7.1 earthquake during SanFrancisco-Oakland World Series, Berlin Wall came down, "Wind Beneath My Wings" was the number one song the month we graduated. The 49ers won the Superbowl. Really people, have things changed that much in 20 years (except for the dominance of bay area sports teams)? Do you wonder why I don't feel old? A few other little things happened that year too. I fell in love with one Mr. Mike Meeker. I graduated from high school. This past Saturday, Mike and I got gussied up and headed to downtown Sacramento for our class reunion. We had a wonderful time. I never went back to high school after graduation and I lost touch with most people rather quickly. I was young and stupid. So this event was even more special because I had the opportunity to see and visit with people I hadn't seen in literally twenty years. Because Mike and I didn't date until after high school, we never got to go to prom or a dance together. So Mike pointed out that this was like our prom and we tried hard to make it fun and celebratory. I got to have my hair done which was a treat and I liked my black dress that I found at Nordstrom months ago. I wore jewelry and shoes I had and Mike pulled out some clothes from his closet and we hit the town.
"High school is the place that you saw the prettiest girls you have ever known in real life. And then there was always that guy. The one you got up for in the morning. He was what made high school worth bothering with."(Drew Barrymore - Never Been Kissed)
It's nice to know that those girls are still just as beautiful and that the boy is now just a regular guy with kids and a mortgage. I felt so thankful that my life turned out exactly as it has. How many paths could I have walked instead of becoming Amy Meeker, Jessica and Katie's Mom? I'm so thankful that God didn't pay too much attention to the boys names I doodled on my binder and that I didn't end up following through with my "wanting to go to boarding school" phase. I'm glad I got involved in school, got good grades and made friends. Because it was so fun to see these people last Saturday. Here are just a few shots and funny details that I'd like to share.
(Above) On the left is Kori. Her blog is linked on the right. We keep in touch still so she got a front seat to my pre-reunion anxiety. She has the best laugh of anyone on the planet earth. It is deep and loud and guaranteed to make you laugh. And she laughs often. So that means you laugh often when you are with her. She's the coolest. The guy in the middle is Tai. He is maybe the kindest most likable person I have ever known. And to catch up with him and discover he is wonderfully happy and in love with his wife and three daughters warmed my heart and made me feel better about the world.
(Above) This is Jen on the left. Jen did such a good job at rounding up our classmates and getting us all there. Tara is on her right. She headed the whole shindig up and made sure we had an awesome time. They had help from the others on the committee like Sherri (pix to follow) and they could not have done a better job. We had the entire McCormick & Schmick's restaurant and it was classy but laid back at the same time. Such a perfect venue and organized fantastically. And I found out that Tara reads my blog! Shout out to you Tara...the best P.E. teacher and reunion organizer EVER! When we were in school, Tara made us all watch Dirty Dancing with her over and over again. And she was scared of my dog Moz. She used to jump to the top of our couch when he came in. And he was such a nice dog. Seriously, she used to freak.
(Above) So my Dad coached my softball teams for a lot of years. Our name was "The Ms.Fits" which was the name of a women's clothing store in town that was also our team sponsor. Paula (L) and Channa (R) were on our team for years. Paula played left field for our team and was so much fun and was the spirit and heart of our team. One night she took a fly ball to the forehead and had the biggest knot on her head I've ever seen to this day. You could see the stitches of the ball imprinted on her forehead. Channa was our star pitcher. My Dad's favorite story when people ask him how coaching girls is different than coaching boys is about Channa. It was our Championship game, a huge game and we were playing the #1 ranked team. But it was also Junior Prom the next day. Channa showed up at the game with freshly manicured acrylic tips with pastel peach polish to match her peach taffeta tea length gown she was going to wear to prom the next day. She explained to my Dad that she couldn't pitch because she just got her nails done. My Dad couldn't believe it. He told her she had to pitch and she started to cry. So then he turned to me and said "Amy you are pitching." And I started to bawl because it was "just TOOOOOO much presssssurrreee Daaaaaad!" See, there was a cute boy that I liked coming to see me play that night AND it was a super big game. So he had his only two pitchers hugging each other and glaring at him in the dug out while we wiped black streaks of Great Lash Mascara off of our cheeks. I remember he grabbed his face and pulled his skin a lot. I don't even remember who pitched or if we won.
This is Glen. He is the greatest and saved my bacon in high school. He was the smartest dude in our class. When I was Student Body President he was our Treasurer. I am not good at math. No seriously, I had to take Algebra more times than I will admit. And there was blackmail involved in me receiving a passing grade in Geometry. And PreCalculus was passed by the smallest of margins possible and was the only time I was even close to straight A's. I had six beautiful A's and then there was my math grade. Glen kept our student council on track and knew where every penny was at all times. I did not. And he used to help me with my math homework. And then Mike Meeker was my math tutor. I paid him. Glen, however, helped me FOR FREE. Thanks Glen. It was great catching up. Glen and his wife fell in love the same year Mike and I did...freshman year of college. That was a good year.
(Above) Hey, who let these guys in? This is a horrible picture of us but it's the only proof we were there together. We sucked at taking pictures.
(Above) This is Sherri and Mike. Sherri was one of my best friends and we have kept in touch. She was the most fun person in the world and we have many an embarrassing memory we share. All boys were in love with Sherri. She had perfect sun streaked hair, perfect blue eyes, perfect cheek bones, white teeth and was tall and willowy. And she had that aloof but sweet quality that teenage boys go crazy over. Mike Meeker, my husband, the father of my children was not immune to Sherri's charms. He took his turn with all the other boys having a crush on Sherri. They had English together one year. He had helped her with school work (for free - go figure) and so for the end of the year they had to do a report on "where they will be in 10 years". Then they had to present it out loud to the class. Mike got up and said he'd be in the Air Force and have a couple kids and would be married to Sherri. The whole class snickered and thought "ha ha, what a nerd face, he is like admitting he loves the hottest girl in school." Then, Sherri got up and gave her report and said she had lived all over the country, had a couple of kids and was married to Mike Meeker. (they planned it out ahead of time) Mike said the whole class was silent and their mouths were gaping open. I think Mike maybe loved this moment a little too much. 
(Above) Here we are at the Sunday family picnic, where we could bring our families to the park and enjoy a picnic lunch and visiting. Mike and I were in charge of the crafts for kids and relay races for all the kids. It was so fun to see our kids play along side kids of the kids we grew up with. On the left is Shelley who I've known since 2nd grade and who is a Principal at a school here in town and who looks as good, if not better, than we did as teenagers. But she's too nice to hate her for it. I'm next in the hat. My hair was like crazy on Sunday morning from the night before so the hat was necessary but made me look like I was on vacation. Mike in a Hawaiian shirt, thus perpetuating the vacation motif of dress for the Meekers. And next to Mike is Kelly, my senior year boyfriend who is also one of the nicest people I have ever known, maybe a tie with Tai. Kelly was my date for the whole of my senior year to all the important events, but more than my date, he was my good friend. We have also kept in touch over the years and he has the most beautiful wife with the prettiest green eyes you have ever seen. And his kids are talented and nice and smart which makes sense given how nice their parents are.
So...2o years. 1989. The FIRST George Bush became President, the Soviet Union - Afghanistan war ended when the USSR left Kabul, Exxon Valdez spilled in Alaska, Rain Man won best picture, Tianamen Square, Seinfeld & The Simpsons premiered on TV, Gameboys came out, Menendez brothers, 7.1 earthquake during SanFrancisco-Oakland World Series, Berlin Wall came down, "Wind Beneath My Wings" was the number one song the month we graduated. The 49ers won the Superbowl. Really people, have things changed that much in 20 years (except for the dominance of bay area sports teams)? Do you wonder why I don't feel old? A few other little things happened that year too. I fell in love with one Mr. Mike Meeker. I graduated from high school. This past Saturday, Mike and I got gussied up and headed to downtown Sacramento for our class reunion. We had a wonderful time. I never went back to high school after graduation and I lost touch with most people rather quickly. I was young and stupid. So this event was even more special because I had the opportunity to see and visit with people I hadn't seen in literally twenty years. Because Mike and I didn't date until after high school, we never got to go to prom or a dance together. So Mike pointed out that this was like our prom and we tried hard to make it fun and celebratory. I got to have my hair done which was a treat and I liked my black dress that I found at Nordstrom months ago. I wore jewelry and shoes I had and Mike pulled out some clothes from his closet and we hit the town.
"High school is the place that you saw the prettiest girls you have ever known in real life. And then there was always that guy. The one you got up for in the morning. He was what made high school worth bothering with."(Drew Barrymore - Never Been Kissed)
It's nice to know that those girls are still just as beautiful and that the boy is now just a regular guy with kids and a mortgage. I felt so thankful that my life turned out exactly as it has. How many paths could I have walked instead of becoming Amy Meeker, Jessica and Katie's Mom? I'm so thankful that God didn't pay too much attention to the boys names I doodled on my binder and that I didn't end up following through with my "wanting to go to boarding school" phase. I'm glad I got involved in school, got good grades and made friends. Because it was so fun to see these people last Saturday. Here are just a few shots and funny details that I'd like to share.
(Above) Classmates from Markoffer Elementary School. I have known some of these people for 31 years. The Asian guy in the back poking his head up used to beat me up with those big huge long chalkboard erasers. In 6th grade we made a gigantic IZOD float with the Alligator because being Preppy was so in. I made my Dad buy me the Preppy handbook. I was not cool. I wore purple knickers and argyle socks in front of these people. I played my first kissing game at a party at the house of the guy behind me in the white shirt. The blond girl in the middle and the girl next to her are still two of the most beautiful girls I have ever seen because they were so Joradache jean, feathered hair, Liz Claiborne purse cool.
(Above) On the left is Kori. Her blog is linked on the right. We keep in touch still so she got a front seat to my pre-reunion anxiety. She has the best laugh of anyone on the planet earth. It is deep and loud and guaranteed to make you laugh. And she laughs often. So that means you laugh often when you are with her. She's the coolest. The guy in the middle is Tai. He is maybe the kindest most likable person I have ever known. And to catch up with him and discover he is wonderfully happy and in love with his wife and three daughters warmed my heart and made me feel better about the world.
(Above) This is Jen on the left. Jen did such a good job at rounding up our classmates and getting us all there. Tara is on her right. She headed the whole shindig up and made sure we had an awesome time. They had help from the others on the committee like Sherri (pix to follow) and they could not have done a better job. We had the entire McCormick & Schmick's restaurant and it was classy but laid back at the same time. Such a perfect venue and organized fantastically. And I found out that Tara reads my blog! Shout out to you Tara...the best P.E. teacher and reunion organizer EVER! When we were in school, Tara made us all watch Dirty Dancing with her over and over again. And she was scared of my dog Moz. She used to jump to the top of our couch when he came in. And he was such a nice dog. Seriously, she used to freak.
(Above) So my Dad coached my softball teams for a lot of years. Our name was "The Ms.Fits" which was the name of a women's clothing store in town that was also our team sponsor. Paula (L) and Channa (R) were on our team for years. Paula played left field for our team and was so much fun and was the spirit and heart of our team. One night she took a fly ball to the forehead and had the biggest knot on her head I've ever seen to this day. You could see the stitches of the ball imprinted on her forehead. Channa was our star pitcher. My Dad's favorite story when people ask him how coaching girls is different than coaching boys is about Channa. It was our Championship game, a huge game and we were playing the #1 ranked team. But it was also Junior Prom the next day. Channa showed up at the game with freshly manicured acrylic tips with pastel peach polish to match her peach taffeta tea length gown she was going to wear to prom the next day. She explained to my Dad that she couldn't pitch because she just got her nails done. My Dad couldn't believe it. He told her she had to pitch and she started to cry. So then he turned to me and said "Amy you are pitching." And I started to bawl because it was "just TOOOOOO much presssssurrreee Daaaaaad!" See, there was a cute boy that I liked coming to see me play that night AND it was a super big game. So he had his only two pitchers hugging each other and glaring at him in the dug out while we wiped black streaks of Great Lash Mascara off of our cheeks. I remember he grabbed his face and pulled his skin a lot. I don't even remember who pitched or if we won.
This is Glen. He is the greatest and saved my bacon in high school. He was the smartest dude in our class. When I was Student Body President he was our Treasurer. I am not good at math. No seriously, I had to take Algebra more times than I will admit. And there was blackmail involved in me receiving a passing grade in Geometry. And PreCalculus was passed by the smallest of margins possible and was the only time I was even close to straight A's. I had six beautiful A's and then there was my math grade. Glen kept our student council on track and knew where every penny was at all times. I did not. And he used to help me with my math homework. And then Mike Meeker was my math tutor. I paid him. Glen, however, helped me FOR FREE. Thanks Glen. It was great catching up. Glen and his wife fell in love the same year Mike and I did...freshman year of college. That was a good year.
(Above) Hey, who let these guys in? This is a horrible picture of us but it's the only proof we were there together. We sucked at taking pictures.
(Above) This is Sherri and Mike. Sherri was one of my best friends and we have kept in touch. She was the most fun person in the world and we have many an embarrassing memory we share. All boys were in love with Sherri. She had perfect sun streaked hair, perfect blue eyes, perfect cheek bones, white teeth and was tall and willowy. And she had that aloof but sweet quality that teenage boys go crazy over. Mike Meeker, my husband, the father of my children was not immune to Sherri's charms. He took his turn with all the other boys having a crush on Sherri. They had English together one year. He had helped her with school work (for free - go figure) and so for the end of the year they had to do a report on "where they will be in 10 years". Then they had to present it out loud to the class. Mike got up and said he'd be in the Air Force and have a couple kids and would be married to Sherri. The whole class snickered and thought "ha ha, what a nerd face, he is like admitting he loves the hottest girl in school." Then, Sherri got up and gave her report and said she had lived all over the country, had a couple of kids and was married to Mike Meeker. (they planned it out ahead of time) Mike said the whole class was silent and their mouths were gaping open. I think Mike maybe loved this moment a little too much. 
(Above) Here we are at the Sunday family picnic, where we could bring our families to the park and enjoy a picnic lunch and visiting. Mike and I were in charge of the crafts for kids and relay races for all the kids. It was so fun to see our kids play along side kids of the kids we grew up with. On the left is Shelley who I've known since 2nd grade and who is a Principal at a school here in town and who looks as good, if not better, than we did as teenagers. But she's too nice to hate her for it. I'm next in the hat. My hair was like crazy on Sunday morning from the night before so the hat was necessary but made me look like I was on vacation. Mike in a Hawaiian shirt, thus perpetuating the vacation motif of dress for the Meekers. And next to Mike is Kelly, my senior year boyfriend who is also one of the nicest people I have ever known, maybe a tie with Tai. Kelly was my date for the whole of my senior year to all the important events, but more than my date, he was my good friend. We have also kept in touch over the years and he has the most beautiful wife with the prettiest green eyes you have ever seen. And his kids are talented and nice and smart which makes sense given how nice their parents are.Overall, it was a great two days. I had never gone to a reunion before because we lived so far away and Mike was starting med school or we were doing IVF. If you have a chance to go to a reunion, GO! It's important to take a moment and celebrate how insecure, stupid, innocent and wonderful you were. It's called childhood. Hopefully, at some point, we stop taking it seriously and laugh at the freak show that was called adolescence.
Monday, August 10, 2009
Blocked
I can remember one time when I was little that my cousin Bo trapped me inside of a sleeping bag. I was about 9 and he got it so my head and body were inside and he twisted the opening and sat on it cutting off my exit. I felt trapped. It was dark. I couldn't breathe or cry for help. I kicked and hit and struggled but he was protected from my efforts by the padding of the bag. I felt like I was going to die. Eventually, he let me out. I remember sobbing after I took that first gulp of fresh air. I remember the light was too bright but I refused to shut my eyes, afraid I would plunge into the dark once again. To this day, my worst fear is being blocked from light and air and freedom. As you may have noticed by my absence, as of late, I have been blocked.
A metaphorical sleeping bag had come over me. After knee surgery, I was literally unable to roam freely and found myself fighting to feel human and alive. About six weeks ago, I started to feel very sick to my stomach during various parts of the day. At the most random of times I would break out into a cold sweat and throw up. What started off as annoying quickly turned debilitating. So about four weeks ago I went into my doctor and ended up testing positive for the antibody that is present in the swine flu. I had the swine flu. I already felt like a big, slow moving pig at the county fair that just lays around all day while spectators pay it a visit. Now, the label of "swine" was literal and actual. Go Me! I progressed to get more and more sick more and more often. I had all your basic flu symptoms for weeks. Two weeks ago, I was at a point where I was sick all day everyday. I went in and told my doctor that something else had to be wrong. This just wasn't acting like the flu. So she tested and tested all the things you can test and sent me to a specialist. All is fine except I still am testing positive for the swine flu antibody. I'm not contagious, just frequently symptomatic. There were large portions of the day that were wonderful with no sickness. Then, just as I would be loading my two excited girls in the van after swim lessons, I would puke all over and was unable to drive because I was so dizzy. I'm very lucky I did not experience the respiratory parts of the swine flu that cause serious health risks. I made myself sip water and Gatorade all day to stay semi-hydrated as to avoid further complications. I've had one heck of a year. But I've never been more sick than this in my life.
I hesitated blogging about it. I am so sick of being sick. And I HATE being around people that always seem to have something they are complaining about. Seriously, I hate those sick all the time people. Others view you differently when you are sick or have health issues. They make excuses for you or they pity you. Pity is more than I can bear. Almost as bad as pity is knowing that people are thinking about all the things in your life that you should have done differently to avoid what's going on now. And the worst part is that you know they are right and you know you should have eaten better and kept a better schedule and exercised and stayed on top of all of it but you didn't and now somehow your daughters have been left motherless as you puke your guts out because of all you did or didn't do. And there you are, alone in your room, unable to breathe or see any light. Blocked in that damn sleeping bag again.
I am happy to say that I have taken my first gulps of fresh air and feel grateful to be alive. I have been back to functioning for about 4 or 5 days. I still feel queasy like when you get off a really crazy carnival ride most of the day and I still break out in the flop sweats. But the difference between today and last Sunday night are astounding and amazing. My doctor said this would run it's course and I am overjoyed to say I believe her. When she said it, I was angry and felt it would never end. But (knock on wood), I think it has and I give thanks to God. My knee has also had a big improvement. I am not limping and it's feeling stronger everyday.
I didn't know if it was going to be physically possible, but Mike and I were able to attend our twenty year reunion this past weekend. I will blog about it later, but it was just the cure I needed. I felt so emotionally and physically beaten up. Who knew I needed several doses of fabulous memories and some injections of amazingly kind and fun people from my distant past along with one big ol' date with my favorite friend Mike Meeker to right my upside down reality. I soaked it all in. The butterflies of being nervous to see everyone, the fun of turning my pumpkin self into the best version of an almost 40 year old Cinderella as I could get, the familiar faces, voices and sounds of laughter (thanx Kori). I'll write all about it because I want to remember it. Contrary to what a lot of people like to say...MY 20th class reunion WAS a big deal to me! If I hear one more person say how they "don't care" and "I'm so over high school" and "I don't have anyone to impress" I'm going to go crazy. I shared childhood with these people. They knew me before I had boobs or a career or before I understood the danger of blue eyeshadow. Call me nerdy or pathetic or trapped in the past, but I CARE. I don't care all day everyday and I don't think I am one of those "glory days" kind of people. But dang it, upon the occasion of my 20th year out of high school, I set aside my "coolness" and I willingly gave the occasion my heart. If that makes me sad and pathetic so be it. It was wonderful and fun and exactly what I needed to get myself the air that I so desperately needed to breathe. I feel blocked no longer.
More to come...
A metaphorical sleeping bag had come over me. After knee surgery, I was literally unable to roam freely and found myself fighting to feel human and alive. About six weeks ago, I started to feel very sick to my stomach during various parts of the day. At the most random of times I would break out into a cold sweat and throw up. What started off as annoying quickly turned debilitating. So about four weeks ago I went into my doctor and ended up testing positive for the antibody that is present in the swine flu. I had the swine flu. I already felt like a big, slow moving pig at the county fair that just lays around all day while spectators pay it a visit. Now, the label of "swine" was literal and actual. Go Me! I progressed to get more and more sick more and more often. I had all your basic flu symptoms for weeks. Two weeks ago, I was at a point where I was sick all day everyday. I went in and told my doctor that something else had to be wrong. This just wasn't acting like the flu. So she tested and tested all the things you can test and sent me to a specialist. All is fine except I still am testing positive for the swine flu antibody. I'm not contagious, just frequently symptomatic. There were large portions of the day that were wonderful with no sickness. Then, just as I would be loading my two excited girls in the van after swim lessons, I would puke all over and was unable to drive because I was so dizzy. I'm very lucky I did not experience the respiratory parts of the swine flu that cause serious health risks. I made myself sip water and Gatorade all day to stay semi-hydrated as to avoid further complications. I've had one heck of a year. But I've never been more sick than this in my life.
I hesitated blogging about it. I am so sick of being sick. And I HATE being around people that always seem to have something they are complaining about. Seriously, I hate those sick all the time people. Others view you differently when you are sick or have health issues. They make excuses for you or they pity you. Pity is more than I can bear. Almost as bad as pity is knowing that people are thinking about all the things in your life that you should have done differently to avoid what's going on now. And the worst part is that you know they are right and you know you should have eaten better and kept a better schedule and exercised and stayed on top of all of it but you didn't and now somehow your daughters have been left motherless as you puke your guts out because of all you did or didn't do. And there you are, alone in your room, unable to breathe or see any light. Blocked in that damn sleeping bag again.
I am happy to say that I have taken my first gulps of fresh air and feel grateful to be alive. I have been back to functioning for about 4 or 5 days. I still feel queasy like when you get off a really crazy carnival ride most of the day and I still break out in the flop sweats. But the difference between today and last Sunday night are astounding and amazing. My doctor said this would run it's course and I am overjoyed to say I believe her. When she said it, I was angry and felt it would never end. But (knock on wood), I think it has and I give thanks to God. My knee has also had a big improvement. I am not limping and it's feeling stronger everyday.
I didn't know if it was going to be physically possible, but Mike and I were able to attend our twenty year reunion this past weekend. I will blog about it later, but it was just the cure I needed. I felt so emotionally and physically beaten up. Who knew I needed several doses of fabulous memories and some injections of amazingly kind and fun people from my distant past along with one big ol' date with my favorite friend Mike Meeker to right my upside down reality. I soaked it all in. The butterflies of being nervous to see everyone, the fun of turning my pumpkin self into the best version of an almost 40 year old Cinderella as I could get, the familiar faces, voices and sounds of laughter (thanx Kori). I'll write all about it because I want to remember it. Contrary to what a lot of people like to say...MY 20th class reunion WAS a big deal to me! If I hear one more person say how they "don't care" and "I'm so over high school" and "I don't have anyone to impress" I'm going to go crazy. I shared childhood with these people. They knew me before I had boobs or a career or before I understood the danger of blue eyeshadow. Call me nerdy or pathetic or trapped in the past, but I CARE. I don't care all day everyday and I don't think I am one of those "glory days" kind of people. But dang it, upon the occasion of my 20th year out of high school, I set aside my "coolness" and I willingly gave the occasion my heart. If that makes me sad and pathetic so be it. It was wonderful and fun and exactly what I needed to get myself the air that I so desperately needed to breathe. I feel blocked no longer.
More to come...
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